juicy

I CANNOT believe I am admitting this, but I am one of those girls who puts make-up on to go to the gym...yup...and not just "oh squeezing in a workout between work and home so still have some on" NO, NO...I actually applied make-up this morning knowing full well my itinerary consisted ONLY of a DD drive-thru, the gym, and the mall. For those of you who know me and know I rarely put on much more than powder and mascara, and that's to work, I bet you are confused, yes? Well, no, no hot guys workin' at the DD I am tryin' to impress, not suddenly a "high-maintenance" (stop laughing Mclovin & Booya - I AM NOT!) girl, don't suddenly think it's COOL and in addition am wearing those skin tight yoga pants that say JUICY across the ass, as it seems all "girls who wear make-up at the gym" seem to do...NO, I am trying to cover the ridiculous acne that has suddenly decided to make an appearance...and YES I have tried Proactive and yes I have been to a dermatologist, who BTW said Proactive would be a waste of money in my case (bastard was right).

See, every one's body reacts a little differently to stress...some people get really hungry and tired, some lose their appetites and have upset stomachs all the time, some, like me, break out. I'm not talking a few pimples either, it is gross, awful, yuck, yuck, yuck and I HATE IT...and the only "cure" is to stop being a stress ball. Problem is, part of what stresses me out is the prospect of being forever alone, and having nasty skin makes me not feel attractive, which leads to NOT putting myself out there which means no dates, or even prospects of dates, which just makes the fear of ending up alone that much more real...being broke and going through a divorce happen to be stressers too, but I choose to ignore them...

OK, so...the dermatologist (and Mimi) suggested that I try some stress management, to include; working out more, more yoga, cutting back on the coffee and the booze, and getting more sleep. The only one I have attempted to tackle thus far is the working out, which brings me to standing in my closet, in my workout attire cringing at my appearance and deciding to apply make-up. With every dab of concealer I was thinking "I can't believe I am doing this! This is crazy..." and yet I continued. I continued until my face and neck were a lovely matte beige, finished with mascara and lip gloss...and then a flip switched in my brain and I swear to god I considered changing into yoga pants that said JUICY across the ass.