thanks

My overall anger level was back up to crazy last night…I didn’t run over anyone, but the whole session the other day? Out the window…I was full on pissed. I will not go into details on this public a forum, but let’s just say, as far as I am concerned, I understand NOW how a woman in Georgia beat her ex-husband near to death, WITH A SHOE. To add to my pissedoffedness some jackass keeps calling me, looking for the person that USED to have my phone number, and he woke me up at 5am this morning. I had the alarm set for 5:25 and I REALLY needed that extra 25 minutes. After the half asleep cussin’ he received, though, don’t think he will be callin’ anymore.

On a good note, I am feelin’ much better NOW. I had a very productive day at work…I have projects up to my eyeballs, I am crazy busy, and it feels good. The other, and probably more important, factor in my mood is the overwhelming support I got over the last 24 hours. I gotta say, despite having a real hard time reaching out sometimes, when I do, I don’t ever regret it. Both Mclovin and Booya were there to talk me off the ledge last night…Smash built me up and got me on track this morning…following a wee breakdown upon walking into work a few minutes late and feeling overwhelmed at a meeting and project that was thrust upon me, my work “family” rallied around me and offered up what I can only describe as a circling of the wagons…and then to top it all off, Gigi and Dude were there this afternoon to further build me up and make me laugh and get me happy.

I have never, in my life, felt so cared for and supported and well, loved – corny as it sounds. My relationship with my parents is the best it has ever been, I have more (real) friends than I ever have, and I have never felt so secure and so sure that no matter what, I (and the Pea) will be OK. I have no idea where we will end up, or what life will look like, but I am confident that with the people I have in my life, the rest won’t matter. I was a mess last night, and never did either of my boys lead me to believe (although I am sure they were thinking it) that I was a full on pain in the ass. This morning, despite Smash having a whole lotta her own stress right now, I was able to rant and vent and got some very sound advice. When I just needed to cry for a few minutes and get a hug, all my office mates were there, and never did I feel embarrassed or silly or stupid. And when I needed to just chat and be cheered up, my buds made themselves available, despite their own lives and jobs and issues.

I am blessed, in so many ways…I am thinking back to my Thanksgiving post, ditto that now…and thanks, all of you…you know who you are.