I remember a blog I once read that had a post "day in the life." Most of the posts were very philosophical and intellectual, but the one that just documented the day was the one I enjoyed the most. I thought, what the hell...this was my yesterday. The Pea was with her daddy last night, obviously if I had had her my night would have been quite different.
Started the day by getting the Pea set up in front of the TV with breakfast, making coffee, and taking a shower. I then, get dressed, get her clothes laid out, get her backpack packed...she not only needed her usual change of clothes and a spare, but also her Halloween costume, so she could show daddy. Drink coffee while watching Toot and Puddle with the Pea. Toot and Puddle are pigs...pigs who live together, in their perfect little house in the woods, and travel all over the world on adventures...I am very envious of Toot and Puddle and their adventures...also, they are both boys, think Ernie and Bert. The Pea gets herself dressed while Toot and Puddle muddle through the amazonian rain forest, and then I take her to school. I linger a bit longer than usual, the Pea holds my leg a bit longer than usual, the teacher finally pries us apart and politely pushes me out the door.
Back home, I get on the computer...check email, facebook, write in the private blog, write in this blog, check email again, go to TheFrisky.com and do some reading, decide I need more coffee. Realize there aren't enough coffee grinds for more than a half a cup, curse myself for not having more on hand, decide WTF...dump the tablespoon of new coffee grinds onto the old and run another pot. It's not too bad. Get back on the computer to look for jobs...curse myself for not having a copy of my resume and think about making a new one, decide instead to send messages on facebook and comment on people's status. Have texting conversation with Gigi, have texting conversation with NY.
Decide to apply for online writing job...get very excited, start filling out application. Get to section "List published articles and books, all press appearances, professional accolades" realize I have nothing to list, get frustrated and log off. Pick up my book, turn on SportsCenter, and lay on the couch to read. Read a few chapters, start to fall asleep, get pissed at myself for being a lazy slug, think about going for a run...decide instead to eat...cold pizza. Have texting conversation with Coach. Wander around the house aimlessly, not wanting to clean, but noticing all that needs to be cleaned, decide to go through the stack of mail that has been accumulating over the last month. Find overdue medical bill, panic...realize I can pay online, log back on computer and pay bill...decide while I am at it to pay other bills and balance checkbook, get sad. Smash calls (oh thank God) we talk for 40 minutes...I tell her the deal with Philly, we talk about NY and Coach, we get into a conversation about Pakistan, and then Obama, and then from there survival supplies in case of a disaster...we agree that the price on freeze dried strawberries is ridiculous...and then she is home, so we say goodbye. I check my pantry and realize my hurricane kit consists of one gallon of water and a candle, and think about doing something about that, but decide instead to go through my DVR. I delete programs I know I won't watch, set up new recordings, and end up watching two episodes of Grey's Anatomy, and one of The Office. Call Dancer Girl...we talk about men, money, the kids, and going trick or treating.
Get back on the computer, and remember I promised to call Matchdate # hmmmm, what are we up to? so scroll through old emails to find his number, realize he has the same name as Philly (with the same spelling which is sort of unusual) and am kind of weirded out. I call anyway, get voicemail (yay!) leave a message that I am on my way out to watch the game with some friends, and that I will call him another day. I take a shower, get in bed, turn on the game. Have texting conversation with NY. Coach calls...we talk about getting together, but don't make any actual plans to do so. I get up, get a beer, and realize I am hungry...I take my beer, and a plate of cheese and crackers, back to my bed and watch the rest of the game...make a mental note to self that tomorrow I should eat something other than cheese topped carbs.
New Matchdate guys calls, at first I am like "who the hell?" then I remember and answer. His voice is just like Philly's...his accent is just like Philly's...I mention the baseball game and he says "I am from Philly." I throw up a little in my mouth. I want to hang up the phone but he is just talking away...OH. MY. GOD. NewPhilly wants to get together sometime, but since the poor guy already has two strikes against him that he doesn't know about and has no control over, I feel bad. I know that the slightest thing is going to send me screaming from him, and he won't know what the hell happened.
I hang up, turn off the light, and try to sleep. I toss and turn for what feels like hours, finally fall asleep, and wake up this morning at 7. Without any real reason to get out of bed, I stay there until 9.
Friday, October 30, 2009
Thursday, October 29, 2009
catch up
A lot has happened the past few days...some good, some not so...a quick update and then some sh*t that doesn't s#ck...
Tuesday I had to go into work to sign some papers and say goodbye. Donning a visitors badge verses my regular badge was more a kick in the gut that I imagined it would be...I didn't like it much at all...it very much sucked. Signing papers that made the whole deal official...sucked bad. Having the man who decided to get rid of me play nice, condescend me, and pretend to "care" really sucked...for the record Boss Man: you can't yank the rug out from underneath some one's feet, put them between a rock and a hard place, force them to make a decision in a few days that they never imagined they would have to make at all, justify it all with the ol' "budget" argument when the company pissed away more than their salary at a convention the week before and expect anything BUT seething anger...I mean c'mon...seriously?
[short break while I do some yoga and deep breathing in order to prevent myself from having a stroke...]
Ok, then...so on a good note...oh wait, first more bad...pretty sure Philly and I are done. The stress of having the Yanks and the Phillies play each other in the World Series was just too much of a strain on the relationship and we called it quits last night...no, not really. The stress of everything else going on in our respective lives, yes, but even I am not one to walk away from someone over baseball...football perhaps, but not baseball. It just got too hard, and this early on and with everything else going on, I couldn't do hard. [So laughing out loud right now as my filthy little mind went straight to naughty...perhaps I should have said difficult.]
Now, for the good stuff. I have a new boy to add to my circle, welcome NY. Ever know someone for years, but not really know them, and then all of a sudden spend some time with them in a different setting and realize they are really cool? He was the last person I expected to be my shoulder for the last two weeks, but he was, and what a nice surprise. Another nice surprise...I got a tax refund...talk about good timing too. I know, I know, taxes should have been done back in April, if not before, but given DH and I had to work together to do them, it didn't actually happen until sometime near midnight on October 14th. The deposit into my account came this week, and because of all that was going on, I had forgotten it was coming, so yippee! Another yippee...Booya is on his way home!! He will be here tomorrow, and I can't wait to squeeze him. Last on my list of good stuff, I may FINALLY get to see Coach in action this weekend. Every game I planned on going to I never made it to, and it looks like this time it is actually gonna happen...fingers crossed nothing comes up, and it doesn't rain.
Ok, you are all caught up, and I promise to start writing more...more stories, more random thoughts, more musings on this lovely and confusing life...it's not like I don't have time. In the meantime, a little work humor for ya: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5hCgzvC028k
Tuesday I had to go into work to sign some papers and say goodbye. Donning a visitors badge verses my regular badge was more a kick in the gut that I imagined it would be...I didn't like it much at all...it very much sucked. Signing papers that made the whole deal official...sucked bad. Having the man who decided to get rid of me play nice, condescend me, and pretend to "care" really sucked...for the record Boss Man: you can't yank the rug out from underneath some one's feet, put them between a rock and a hard place, force them to make a decision in a few days that they never imagined they would have to make at all, justify it all with the ol' "budget" argument when the company pissed away more than their salary at a convention the week before and expect anything BUT seething anger...I mean c'mon...seriously?
[short break while I do some yoga and deep breathing in order to prevent myself from having a stroke...]
Ok, then...so on a good note...oh wait, first more bad...pretty sure Philly and I are done. The stress of having the Yanks and the Phillies play each other in the World Series was just too much of a strain on the relationship and we called it quits last night...no, not really. The stress of everything else going on in our respective lives, yes, but even I am not one to walk away from someone over baseball...football perhaps, but not baseball. It just got too hard, and this early on and with everything else going on, I couldn't do hard. [So laughing out loud right now as my filthy little mind went straight to naughty...perhaps I should have said difficult.]
Now, for the good stuff. I have a new boy to add to my circle, welcome NY. Ever know someone for years, but not really know them, and then all of a sudden spend some time with them in a different setting and realize they are really cool? He was the last person I expected to be my shoulder for the last two weeks, but he was, and what a nice surprise. Another nice surprise...I got a tax refund...talk about good timing too. I know, I know, taxes should have been done back in April, if not before, but given DH and I had to work together to do them, it didn't actually happen until sometime near midnight on October 14th. The deposit into my account came this week, and because of all that was going on, I had forgotten it was coming, so yippee! Another yippee...Booya is on his way home!! He will be here tomorrow, and I can't wait to squeeze him. Last on my list of good stuff, I may FINALLY get to see Coach in action this weekend. Every game I planned on going to I never made it to, and it looks like this time it is actually gonna happen...fingers crossed nothing comes up, and it doesn't rain.
Ok, you are all caught up, and I promise to start writing more...more stories, more random thoughts, more musings on this lovely and confusing life...it's not like I don't have time. In the meantime, a little work humor for ya: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5hCgzvC028k
Monday, October 26, 2009
polyester dreams
So the first "real" day of unemployment...very weird.
I made a list, last night, of all the things I wanted to accomplish this week. Some things I have wanted to get done for months and just haven't, a few are in an effort to secure a new job, and a few because of the job loss. To keep the Pea on a good schedule, and to prevent me from getting lazy and spending all day on the couch watching ESPN, I decided I would get up 7:30, get us both ready, and then spend the day working on my list while the Pea was at school. Well, I woke up at 7:29, yay for me, good start...I turned on the light and the Pea walked in "hey baby doll, g'mornin...wanna snuggle with mommy for a few minutes before we get up?" Next thing I knew it was 9:04...it is now 10:30...the Pea is finally at school, I am watching SportsCenter, the list is taunting me from the kitchen counter.
One of the things on the list is the rather obvious "GET A F*CKING JOB" and apparently it is weighing on me SO much that my subconscious already has me working. I had a dream I was a Hooters girl. There I was, in my too tight tank, teeny tiny heinous orange short shorts with my ass hanging out, and ridiculous knee socks, slinging wings. Then, as in dreams it is possible to do, it was suddenly the end of my shift and I was leaning against the counter counting my tips and telling one of the other girls how surprised I was I wasn't more tired, since I hadn't waitressed in so long, and wasn't used to being on my feet all day. I woke up in a panic because it was one of those really real dreams and I was embarrassed for myself...I am too old to be a Hooters girl, and don't look good in orange.
The dream has me a bit shaken...I had all this confidence last week that I would find a "real" job soon and not be left in a position that I would have to take one of those jobs that lends itself to a heinous polyester uniform, but I have been here before. I have never waitressed in a "real" restaurant, ya know with cloth napkins and pepper mills, where if you are part of the wait staff you can actually make a decent living and consider it a career. No, the extent of my waitressing experience has been while donning something gross and pretending to flirt with drunk ass morons who think they have done you a favor by giving you a dollar. Waffle House and Pure Gold...oh yeah...very unflattering brown stripes and far TOO flattering gold sequins.
I went to college on an academic scholarship, so everything from tuition to books was paid for...they drew the line at cute shoes though, so I needed to make some money and the Waffle House was the only place in town that was hiring at the time. I later got a bartending job which was a whole lot better, but for months I endured that awful polyester brown mess they called a uniform and slung hashbrowns "scattered, smothered, topped" and perfectly browned waffles. The Pure Gold gig was while I was in flight school, a decade later. Flight hours aren't cheap, and until I got a job working for the company that ran the flight school and was able to weasel free flight time, I had to endure gold sequins, and high heels, and sling $6 Budweisers.
I have no idea what job I will end up getting when it is all said and done, but God help me if I end up having to wear anything polyester, striped, or sequined...that really would be a nightmare.
I made a list, last night, of all the things I wanted to accomplish this week. Some things I have wanted to get done for months and just haven't, a few are in an effort to secure a new job, and a few because of the job loss. To keep the Pea on a good schedule, and to prevent me from getting lazy and spending all day on the couch watching ESPN, I decided I would get up 7:30, get us both ready, and then spend the day working on my list while the Pea was at school. Well, I woke up at 7:29, yay for me, good start...I turned on the light and the Pea walked in "hey baby doll, g'mornin...wanna snuggle with mommy for a few minutes before we get up?" Next thing I knew it was 9:04...it is now 10:30...the Pea is finally at school, I am watching SportsCenter, the list is taunting me from the kitchen counter.
One of the things on the list is the rather obvious "GET A F*CKING JOB" and apparently it is weighing on me SO much that my subconscious already has me working. I had a dream I was a Hooters girl. There I was, in my too tight tank, teeny tiny heinous orange short shorts with my ass hanging out, and ridiculous knee socks, slinging wings. Then, as in dreams it is possible to do, it was suddenly the end of my shift and I was leaning against the counter counting my tips and telling one of the other girls how surprised I was I wasn't more tired, since I hadn't waitressed in so long, and wasn't used to being on my feet all day. I woke up in a panic because it was one of those really real dreams and I was embarrassed for myself...I am too old to be a Hooters girl, and don't look good in orange.
The dream has me a bit shaken...I had all this confidence last week that I would find a "real" job soon and not be left in a position that I would have to take one of those jobs that lends itself to a heinous polyester uniform, but I have been here before. I have never waitressed in a "real" restaurant, ya know with cloth napkins and pepper mills, where if you are part of the wait staff you can actually make a decent living and consider it a career. No, the extent of my waitressing experience has been while donning something gross and pretending to flirt with drunk ass morons who think they have done you a favor by giving you a dollar. Waffle House and Pure Gold...oh yeah...very unflattering brown stripes and far TOO flattering gold sequins.
I went to college on an academic scholarship, so everything from tuition to books was paid for...they drew the line at cute shoes though, so I needed to make some money and the Waffle House was the only place in town that was hiring at the time. I later got a bartending job which was a whole lot better, but for months I endured that awful polyester brown mess they called a uniform and slung hashbrowns "scattered, smothered, topped" and perfectly browned waffles. The Pure Gold gig was while I was in flight school, a decade later. Flight hours aren't cheap, and until I got a job working for the company that ran the flight school and was able to weasel free flight time, I had to endure gold sequins, and high heels, and sling $6 Budweisers.
I have no idea what job I will end up getting when it is all said and done, but God help me if I end up having to wear anything polyester, striped, or sequined...that really would be a nightmare.
Saturday, October 24, 2009
saturday
Yesterday ended up being a pretty good day...just hung out with the Pea until it was time to drop her off with DH, and then off to spend the night with Betty. The plan was to go to a football game, but we never made it. We ended up at a party instead, which while quite nice, I am somewhat regretting right now, cuz my motivation to get up and going is slim to none. Today my plan is to get ready and head out of town...I am off do to some visiting, and then chick night with Sexylegs. [To Grey: pretty sure there won't be any penis straws this time, matter of fact I had no idea such a thing existed until you mentioned it, but if you let me know where I can find them I will pick some up for next time, I'm sure the girls will appreciate ;) ] I love chick nights...I think hanging out with a bunch of really cool women, drinking wine, and talking about everything from kids (men), to work (men), to sex (men) is great, and I am looking forward to it. If there is any chance I will get there in time though, I need to get off this computer and in the shower, so I am off...more tomorrow.
Friday, October 23, 2009
day 1
Unemployment day 1.
I didn't think today would bother me...I figured, since I normally don't work on Friday, it would be like any other, and the reality wouldn't hit until Monday. Wrong. I am antsy as hell, really nervous, and feel overwhelmed with all there is to do. I need to file for unemployment, get my resume in order (where the hell IS my resume...I haven't seen it in 7 years...) start looking for jobs, make calls, get the word out, etc. etc. etc. I KNOW I don't need to do all this today, it just FEELS like I need to do it all today.
When I left work yesterday, drove out of the gate for the last time as an employee, I cried for a half an hour...I spent most of last weekend in denial...the beginning of the week pissed off as hell...and then as the reality of never getting up and going to work in that place, seeing those people again dawned, I just lost it. I was getting inundated with texts and calls and talked to a few of them, but I really just wanted to turn the radio up loud and drive. By the end of the two hour drive when I pulled into the parking lot of the Pea's school, I was at acceptance, I felt good, and I was ready to see my baby girl. I had Kings of Leon in the CD player and as we neared home "Use Somebody" started playing. The Pea knows all the words and was singing along, loud and off key, and it hit me...I have a really cool kid, a really great little person that is turning 4 in a few weeks and NOW an opportunity to hang out with her. I will be able to be at her birthday party at school, I will be able to do stuff in the afternoons with her instead of home and right to bed, I won't be so damn tired all the time and will be a better mommy to this really fun kid, who happens to have great taste in music.
We spent the night at my friend Betty's house...she knew I wouldn't want to be alone, and felt like we should be celebrating my new adventure, so she made me come over, fed me Mexican (which you all know is my favorite) and we toasted, over many margaritas, my new life. We toasted unemployment, time off to spend with my kid, doors opening that I don't even know about yet, and blessings in disguise. I crashed hard about 10pm and slept...actually slept, for the first time in I don't know how long...until 8am.
As I embark on my new "adventure" I am both nervous and excited...I KNOW it will all work out, I know I will end up in a better place and look back grateful...I know that the next few months that I am able to spend with the Pea will be some of the best of my life and ones I will cherish forever. I am nervous about the unknown, about the work involved to find a new job, about losing my motivation after a few weeks and getting down. I am excited that I will now have more time to write and to spend with friends and family...I am excited that this forces me to pursue some of the jobs and the opportunities that I haven't because of a lack of time (and by that I mean lack of courage conveniently written off as lack of time)...I am excited that I am excited. I didn't feel this way after losing the last two jobs...and I was younger and had less responsibility.
Ok...despite feeling like there is much to do, I am gonna go squeeze my kid instead...I am gonna get off this computer, start fresh on Monday with the job search, and just go out and enjoy the day. It is gorgeous outside, we should be out there...or at the very least: in the car, driving around, with the music up loud, singing off key.
I didn't think today would bother me...I figured, since I normally don't work on Friday, it would be like any other, and the reality wouldn't hit until Monday. Wrong. I am antsy as hell, really nervous, and feel overwhelmed with all there is to do. I need to file for unemployment, get my resume in order (where the hell IS my resume...I haven't seen it in 7 years...) start looking for jobs, make calls, get the word out, etc. etc. etc. I KNOW I don't need to do all this today, it just FEELS like I need to do it all today.
When I left work yesterday, drove out of the gate for the last time as an employee, I cried for a half an hour...I spent most of last weekend in denial...the beginning of the week pissed off as hell...and then as the reality of never getting up and going to work in that place, seeing those people again dawned, I just lost it. I was getting inundated with texts and calls and talked to a few of them, but I really just wanted to turn the radio up loud and drive. By the end of the two hour drive when I pulled into the parking lot of the Pea's school, I was at acceptance, I felt good, and I was ready to see my baby girl. I had Kings of Leon in the CD player and as we neared home "Use Somebody" started playing. The Pea knows all the words and was singing along, loud and off key, and it hit me...I have a really cool kid, a really great little person that is turning 4 in a few weeks and NOW an opportunity to hang out with her. I will be able to be at her birthday party at school, I will be able to do stuff in the afternoons with her instead of home and right to bed, I won't be so damn tired all the time and will be a better mommy to this really fun kid, who happens to have great taste in music.
We spent the night at my friend Betty's house...she knew I wouldn't want to be alone, and felt like we should be celebrating my new adventure, so she made me come over, fed me Mexican (which you all know is my favorite) and we toasted, over many margaritas, my new life. We toasted unemployment, time off to spend with my kid, doors opening that I don't even know about yet, and blessings in disguise. I crashed hard about 10pm and slept...actually slept, for the first time in I don't know how long...until 8am.
As I embark on my new "adventure" I am both nervous and excited...I KNOW it will all work out, I know I will end up in a better place and look back grateful...I know that the next few months that I am able to spend with the Pea will be some of the best of my life and ones I will cherish forever. I am nervous about the unknown, about the work involved to find a new job, about losing my motivation after a few weeks and getting down. I am excited that I will now have more time to write and to spend with friends and family...I am excited that this forces me to pursue some of the jobs and the opportunities that I haven't because of a lack of time (and by that I mean lack of courage conveniently written off as lack of time)...I am excited that I am excited. I didn't feel this way after losing the last two jobs...and I was younger and had less responsibility.
Ok...despite feeling like there is much to do, I am gonna go squeeze my kid instead...I am gonna get off this computer, start fresh on Monday with the job search, and just go out and enjoy the day. It is gorgeous outside, we should be out there...or at the very least: in the car, driving around, with the music up loud, singing off key.
Saturday, October 17, 2009
f*ck
Well I clearly spoke too soon...just when I thought things were getting settled, life was looking good, and I had my shit together, the rug got yanked right out from under foot. I lost my job yesterday...they did away with it. Back to square one, back to WTF am I gonna do? How the f*ck am I gonna make it? Why can't I ever get on track and into a routine for more than a day or two? Back to chaos...should make for some good stories, huh?
Thursday, October 15, 2009
fabulous
I had a pretty fabulous day today. Yesterday was hard, long, and no fun...today, just the opposite. I played in a golf tournament this morning with one of my besties...got to catch up with a bunch of the golfergirls, and then had a great lunch and drinks after...must say, catching up with friends, playing golf, and raising money doesn't suck. Wish I had more for my usual Thursday post, but just haven't run across much fun stuff this week...next week I will try to have lots.
After I got home from the golf course I decided to take some time for myself and enjoy the rest of the day...I was missing the Pea, but tried to make the most of the time at home without her, without falling into a funk. I went for a run, took a long hot shower, and then caught up on a little of the tv in my dvr. I have to work tomorrow, to make up for today, and should be heading to bed right about now, but silly me made the superb decision to grab a coffee this after noon and am still a bit amped up so I figured I would try and write. Unfortunately, not only do I not have anything to share for my Sh*t that doesn't S#ck, I don't have any stories either. Seems like even though life has been busy and crazy, it hasn't been chaotic, and out of chaos usually comes the stories.
I feel like I am finally settling into a routine, getting my shit straight, and doing an ok job of taking care of both me and the Pea. I guess it is about time, huh? DH and I are finally at a point where things will be finalized and settled...we had what should probably be the last "talk" today. I had a bit of Cosmo courage leaving the course (we HAD to drink something pink, it was a breast cancer fundraiser after all) and was feeling good, and made a call I had been dreading. Luckily, he was ready to talk, and we got it all settled. It wasn't fun, or nice, or easy, but there was a huge sense of relief when it was over. We can finally both move on. This past week has been tough on both of us and the Pea picked up on it...she acted out in school and hasn't been sleeping, and I think we both realized we just had to get it done...face the losses, suck it up, and move forward.
There were 5 cancer survivors playing in the tournament today...2 just a year cancer free. Seeing them, hugging them, taking a step back from my shit for a minute to realize that having my health is so very lucky and REALLY, all that matters, changed my perspective a bit. Maybe it wasn't just the Cosmo that gave me courage...maybe it was being inspired by women far stronger, tougher, and more resilient than I. Surviving cancer: doesn't suck...surviving, and thriving, and taking advantage of every day...fabulous...cheers to you ladies, and thanks for the inspiration.
After I got home from the golf course I decided to take some time for myself and enjoy the rest of the day...I was missing the Pea, but tried to make the most of the time at home without her, without falling into a funk. I went for a run, took a long hot shower, and then caught up on a little of the tv in my dvr. I have to work tomorrow, to make up for today, and should be heading to bed right about now, but silly me made the superb decision to grab a coffee this after noon and am still a bit amped up so I figured I would try and write. Unfortunately, not only do I not have anything to share for my Sh*t that doesn't S#ck, I don't have any stories either. Seems like even though life has been busy and crazy, it hasn't been chaotic, and out of chaos usually comes the stories.
I feel like I am finally settling into a routine, getting my shit straight, and doing an ok job of taking care of both me and the Pea. I guess it is about time, huh? DH and I are finally at a point where things will be finalized and settled...we had what should probably be the last "talk" today. I had a bit of Cosmo courage leaving the course (we HAD to drink something pink, it was a breast cancer fundraiser after all) and was feeling good, and made a call I had been dreading. Luckily, he was ready to talk, and we got it all settled. It wasn't fun, or nice, or easy, but there was a huge sense of relief when it was over. We can finally both move on. This past week has been tough on both of us and the Pea picked up on it...she acted out in school and hasn't been sleeping, and I think we both realized we just had to get it done...face the losses, suck it up, and move forward.
There were 5 cancer survivors playing in the tournament today...2 just a year cancer free. Seeing them, hugging them, taking a step back from my shit for a minute to realize that having my health is so very lucky and REALLY, all that matters, changed my perspective a bit. Maybe it wasn't just the Cosmo that gave me courage...maybe it was being inspired by women far stronger, tougher, and more resilient than I. Surviving cancer: doesn't suck...surviving, and thriving, and taking advantage of every day...fabulous...cheers to you ladies, and thanks for the inspiration.
Monday, October 12, 2009
4 days
My four day holiday weekend just flew by...swear to God it was just Thursday night, like, a minute ago...*sigh*
Given that the weekend was FILLED with awesome games, both football and baseball, every spare minute was spent in front of a TV either watching a game or watching highlights from the games...hence, I never got on the computer for more than a minute or two to check email.
Friday was non-stop...I started the day with a visit to my lawyer, and let me just say, for the record, divorce SUCKS...no, not just sucks, sucks bad...I don't recommend doing it...EVER. Not only is it awful, but it aint cheap...uck. After the lawyer came some happy fun time (no, not that kind of happy fun time, darnit) as I decided to finally cash in a gift certificate I won for free golf lessons. It was nice to be back out there, smashing the ball, and since I have another tournament to play in this week (Rally For The Cure...find one, play in it!) it doesn't hurt that I have confidence in my swing again. After the golf came a quick visit with Gigi to catch up and then later, dinner with Lady. What was supposed to be a "me" day quickly turned into a "run myself ragged" day and despite it all being good, was exhausting.
Saturday started off with pumpkin doughnuts and a run...finished with a trip to the park and the pumpkin patch...it was a great mommy day, and the Pea was ridiculously cute and fun. When the Florida @ LSU game started I tried to put her to bed but she was so adamant about staying up to watch, that instead of fighting with her, I just let her watch the first quarter. A few highlights from the game: every time there was a first down the Pea yelled "pirates!" (ECU fans will appreciate), when Tebow dropped his mouth guard and had to take a time out, I said "what was that about?" the Pea, without skipping a beat said, "The alligator guy was bad, when you are bad you need a time out...he had to go to TIME OUT!" and upon seeing the LSU tiger asked "Mommy, do alligators eat tigers?" Ahh, out of the mouths of babes...
Sunday started with some visiting and then...more football. A few highlights: The Panthers FINALLY won a game...it wasn't pretty, and against most other teams would have been a loss, but it was a W and that means they won't go 0-16, whew. While watching that game the Pea asked if we could watch "the other game" soooo, I switched to the other game, only to be told "NOOO, the OTHER game...with the alligators...it was better." LOL...yes, baby, it was a better game, but cut the Panthers some slack. After that, the Pats @ Denver, and sorry Coach but you have some competition for my favorite football coach on the planet...is anyone else in love with Josh McDaniels? I detest the Broncos, but boy do I love the coach, the game was awesome and his reaction to the win was priceless...fun to watch. The Colts *smile* they make me happy...the Yanks...yay...nice to see ARod doing something in the post season...the Sox, uhm wow...that's it? I know as a Yanks fan I should be delighted, but I just figured you guys would be around a little longer.
Today was nice...planned on playing golf, but with rain threatening went to a movie instead. Saw Couples Retreat...it was good, and definitely funny, but bummed me out a little. Hell, I can watch Vince Vaughn in pretty much anything and end up happy, but since the whole thing was couple and marriage centered it made me think of my own marriage, and its early demise, and well, I just wouldn't recommend if you are at the end stages of a divorce...Philly agreed, as we are both at that stage, and we both left the theater kind of blah. Better now, as the Pea was delighted to see me when I picked her up tonight, and since, well...you guessed it...there is more football.
Given that the weekend was FILLED with awesome games, both football and baseball, every spare minute was spent in front of a TV either watching a game or watching highlights from the games...hence, I never got on the computer for more than a minute or two to check email.
Friday was non-stop...I started the day with a visit to my lawyer, and let me just say, for the record, divorce SUCKS...no, not just sucks, sucks bad...I don't recommend doing it...EVER. Not only is it awful, but it aint cheap...uck. After the lawyer came some happy fun time (no, not that kind of happy fun time, darnit) as I decided to finally cash in a gift certificate I won for free golf lessons. It was nice to be back out there, smashing the ball, and since I have another tournament to play in this week (Rally For The Cure...find one, play in it!) it doesn't hurt that I have confidence in my swing again. After the golf came a quick visit with Gigi to catch up and then later, dinner with Lady. What was supposed to be a "me" day quickly turned into a "run myself ragged" day and despite it all being good, was exhausting.
Saturday started off with pumpkin doughnuts and a run...finished with a trip to the park and the pumpkin patch...it was a great mommy day, and the Pea was ridiculously cute and fun. When the Florida @ LSU game started I tried to put her to bed but she was so adamant about staying up to watch, that instead of fighting with her, I just let her watch the first quarter. A few highlights from the game: every time there was a first down the Pea yelled "pirates!" (ECU fans will appreciate), when Tebow dropped his mouth guard and had to take a time out, I said "what was that about?" the Pea, without skipping a beat said, "The alligator guy was bad, when you are bad you need a time out...he had to go to TIME OUT!" and upon seeing the LSU tiger asked "Mommy, do alligators eat tigers?" Ahh, out of the mouths of babes...
Sunday started with some visiting and then...more football. A few highlights: The Panthers FINALLY won a game...it wasn't pretty, and against most other teams would have been a loss, but it was a W and that means they won't go 0-16, whew. While watching that game the Pea asked if we could watch "the other game" soooo, I switched to the other game, only to be told "NOOO, the OTHER game...with the alligators...it was better." LOL...yes, baby, it was a better game, but cut the Panthers some slack. After that, the Pats @ Denver, and sorry Coach but you have some competition for my favorite football coach on the planet...is anyone else in love with Josh McDaniels? I detest the Broncos, but boy do I love the coach, the game was awesome and his reaction to the win was priceless...fun to watch. The Colts *smile* they make me happy...the Yanks...yay...nice to see ARod doing something in the post season...the Sox, uhm wow...that's it? I know as a Yanks fan I should be delighted, but I just figured you guys would be around a little longer.
Today was nice...planned on playing golf, but with rain threatening went to a movie instead. Saw Couples Retreat...it was good, and definitely funny, but bummed me out a little. Hell, I can watch Vince Vaughn in pretty much anything and end up happy, but since the whole thing was couple and marriage centered it made me think of my own marriage, and its early demise, and well, I just wouldn't recommend if you are at the end stages of a divorce...Philly agreed, as we are both at that stage, and we both left the theater kind of blah. Better now, as the Pea was delighted to see me when I picked her up tonight, and since, well...you guessed it...there is more football.
Thursday, October 8, 2009
stages
Ok, so I don't have much this week for my Sh*t That Doesn't S#ck, I haven't had much time to surf the internet in search of cool stuff...I did, however, run across this little gem and wanted to share. The boys at Maxim broke down relationships into 5 stages and I thought they were hilarious...and whether you think BEING in a relationship sucks or doesn't suck is irrelevant...the truth is they all start out pretty much like they say in Stage 1 and go from there...this is from the guys perspective, of course, but since most of the time I act like a guy (Dude, stop laughing, I am still pissed you called me out on Monday) I can totally relate...Enjoy:
Tuesday, October 6, 2009
forgetful fairy
I was a little late getting home tonight because I got stuck behind both a school bus AND a tractor, and then had to stop for gas...I was a bit irritated and tired, and wasn't at all looking forward to cooking dinner or doing the nightly routine. UNTIL, I walked into the house and realized the house was clean...oh yeah, the bathrooms, the kitchen...laundry done, beds made, trash taken out...WTF? Did the cleaning fairies FINALLY show? Then I remembered...I did all that...Sunday afternoon and Monday morning, all so I wouldn't have to worry about it tonight... and had completely forgotten. I would like to think it is an indication of starting to get my shit together, but since I didn't remember doing it, and was perplexed when I got home, perhaps not...
cougartown
Had a busy weekend and never got a chance to write, and then was planning on writing before the game last night, but it just didn't happen...oh well. So the weekend went well, had a nice Friday with Mom, did lunch, pedis, and some shopping and then home. Watched a movie: Sunshine Cleaning, highly recommend. I thought it was awesome...mom thought it was OK. Saturday we did the outdoor festival thing, which is always way more crowded and a lot less fun than you think it will be going into it. It didn't help it got hot, really hot, and we were dressed for not hot...uck, by the time we got to the car to go home we were all sweaty and tired and cranky. Saturday night mom watched the Pea for me so I could go to a party with Philly.
The party itself was great...good people, good food, lots of booze...it made me feel a bit old, however. See, the party was a 30th birthday and I was the OLDEST person there. Most of my friends are nearing 40 (and more) and 30 seems so long ago...when they brought out the cake and I saw the numbers, and a discussion was had about how he was "the old man" there, I snuck out the back door to get some air in hopes the age discussion wouldn't turn my way. I try not to think about the fact that Philly is nearly 10 years my junior, cuz then it makes me crazy, but sometimes I just can't help it. For the most part the age thing doesn't bother me, and is not a factor in the relationship, but every once in awhile I get smacked in the face with reality and I get to thinking.
The fact that "cougars" are all the rage in the media right now doesn't help. Have ya seen Cougartown with Courtney Cox? It is on Wednesday nights...I watched the premier cuz I was told I HAD to (around the workplace they have taken to calling me "cougette") and while it was fun and kinda funny, I wasn't all that impressed. It definitely hit on some of the not so fun aspects of being a new single mom, and still feeling young but not necessarily perceived as such, especially by single men, but it was a little hokey and predictable. Anyway, the second episode, which I didn't watch but heard about the next day, was partly about her secret beauty routines. Apparently she was getting up an hour before her new younger man to do her hair and makeup and then getting back into bed and "waking up" with him, all so he wouldn't ever see her "real" 40 year old face. Well, let me say for the record I am just too damn lazy and like my sleep too damn much to ever do that, but I can certainly understand wanting to. The thought has crossed my mind, more than once, that if Philly sees me in the morning, takes a look at me in that bright morning light, no makeup, hair a mess...sees my wrinkles, age spots, and grey hair...he will realize I am old, and wonder what the hell he is doing. He assures me this will never happen, but it doesn't stop me from thinking about it, and probably one of the reasons I am holding back and not letting the relationship progress.
Don't know what the episode tomorrow night is about, or if I will have a chance to see it, but since everyone else seems to think I can identify with the character I am sure I will hear about it. Of course, the fact that I don't actually identify with, or see myself anything like, the character in Cougartown is irrelevant...I see myself like and can identify with, FAR BETTER, the character in Sunshine Cleaning...but if everyone else wants to think I am sexy, fabulous, have my shit together, and can "snag" a younger man...uh, sure...ok.
The party itself was great...good people, good food, lots of booze...it made me feel a bit old, however. See, the party was a 30th birthday and I was the OLDEST person there. Most of my friends are nearing 40 (and more) and 30 seems so long ago...when they brought out the cake and I saw the numbers, and a discussion was had about how he was "the old man" there, I snuck out the back door to get some air in hopes the age discussion wouldn't turn my way. I try not to think about the fact that Philly is nearly 10 years my junior, cuz then it makes me crazy, but sometimes I just can't help it. For the most part the age thing doesn't bother me, and is not a factor in the relationship, but every once in awhile I get smacked in the face with reality and I get to thinking.
The fact that "cougars" are all the rage in the media right now doesn't help. Have ya seen Cougartown with Courtney Cox? It is on Wednesday nights...I watched the premier cuz I was told I HAD to (around the workplace they have taken to calling me "cougette") and while it was fun and kinda funny, I wasn't all that impressed. It definitely hit on some of the not so fun aspects of being a new single mom, and still feeling young but not necessarily perceived as such, especially by single men, but it was a little hokey and predictable. Anyway, the second episode, which I didn't watch but heard about the next day, was partly about her secret beauty routines. Apparently she was getting up an hour before her new younger man to do her hair and makeup and then getting back into bed and "waking up" with him, all so he wouldn't ever see her "real" 40 year old face. Well, let me say for the record I am just too damn lazy and like my sleep too damn much to ever do that, but I can certainly understand wanting to. The thought has crossed my mind, more than once, that if Philly sees me in the morning, takes a look at me in that bright morning light, no makeup, hair a mess...sees my wrinkles, age spots, and grey hair...he will realize I am old, and wonder what the hell he is doing. He assures me this will never happen, but it doesn't stop me from thinking about it, and probably one of the reasons I am holding back and not letting the relationship progress.
Don't know what the episode tomorrow night is about, or if I will have a chance to see it, but since everyone else seems to think I can identify with the character I am sure I will hear about it. Of course, the fact that I don't actually identify with, or see myself anything like, the character in Cougartown is irrelevant...I see myself like and can identify with, FAR BETTER, the character in Sunshine Cleaning...but if everyone else wants to think I am sexy, fabulous, have my shit together, and can "snag" a younger man...uh, sure...ok.
Friday, October 2, 2009
tgif
TGIF!!!! Just dropped the Pea off at school, came home and mowed my lawn (which if I had waited another day to do would have gotten me lynched by my neighbors), and my next task (which you can tell I am just jumping right into while I sit at the computer) is getting my house clean before my mom gets here. Mom is down in NC for a few weeks and is staying with me this and next weekend. I am very excited about the lunch and pedis we have planned for today and hoping the weather will be nice over the weekend so we can go exploring and have some fun.
When I dropped the Pea at school there was a daddy there, apparently it is career week in the pre-school world. The daddy at Pea's daycare was a police officer and was all decked out in his uniform talking to the kids about safety. The kids were enamored. Now to anyone else this would not be funny, but it cracked me up for two reasons...one, he looked just like the cop in The Hangover "In the face! In the face!" which of course made me think of the movie, and the stun gun scene, and cracked me up and two, it made me remember that earlier in the week I got a chance to see and talk to Dude as he was on his way to his baby girls pre-school to talk to the kids. Well, Dude is a military pilot, which gotta admit is like one of the coolest jobs on the planet, and he was going all decked out in his flight suit and bringing his helmet, and survival equipment...not only do the ladies like a man in uniform, but kids think it is AWESOME and go ape shit. Dude and I got to talking about the whole daddy career day thing, and how cool it is to have a dad with a cool job, and then, of course, we got on topic of dads with not so cool jobs and how their presentations must go (Hi kids, I'm Bob, I'm an accountant...can anyone tell me what a spread sheet is? look auto sum! ooooh, ahhhh) and the thought crossed my mind that if I ever get remarried and have another kid, it will have to be to a guy with a cool job. I don't know why I had that thought, and I don't know what exactly can be considered cool, but I had the thought, which then made me think of the scene in The Breakup "that's what we "in the biz" call..." and then I immediately thought of my profile on Match and now I am gonna have to change it: "sorry, no accountants, please."
This entire thought process took place in the time it took for me to give the Pea a hug and walk out of the building and by the time I got in my car I was laughing out loud. Does anyone else out there have these kinds of random thoughts that lead to other random thoughts that end up so ridiculous you wonder "where the hell did I come up with that, and why?" or is it just me...
Mom...very cool job...which reminds me, mine is on her way and my house is still trashed...signing off, have a great weekend all!
When I dropped the Pea at school there was a daddy there, apparently it is career week in the pre-school world. The daddy at Pea's daycare was a police officer and was all decked out in his uniform talking to the kids about safety. The kids were enamored. Now to anyone else this would not be funny, but it cracked me up for two reasons...one, he looked just like the cop in The Hangover "In the face! In the face!" which of course made me think of the movie, and the stun gun scene, and cracked me up and two, it made me remember that earlier in the week I got a chance to see and talk to Dude as he was on his way to his baby girls pre-school to talk to the kids. Well, Dude is a military pilot, which gotta admit is like one of the coolest jobs on the planet, and he was going all decked out in his flight suit and bringing his helmet, and survival equipment...not only do the ladies like a man in uniform, but kids think it is AWESOME and go ape shit. Dude and I got to talking about the whole daddy career day thing, and how cool it is to have a dad with a cool job, and then, of course, we got on topic of dads with not so cool jobs and how their presentations must go (Hi kids, I'm Bob, I'm an accountant...can anyone tell me what a spread sheet is? look auto sum! ooooh, ahhhh) and the thought crossed my mind that if I ever get remarried and have another kid, it will have to be to a guy with a cool job. I don't know why I had that thought, and I don't know what exactly can be considered cool, but I had the thought, which then made me think of the scene in The Breakup "that's what we "in the biz" call..." and then I immediately thought of my profile on Match and now I am gonna have to change it: "sorry, no accountants, please."
This entire thought process took place in the time it took for me to give the Pea a hug and walk out of the building and by the time I got in my car I was laughing out loud. Does anyone else out there have these kinds of random thoughts that lead to other random thoughts that end up so ridiculous you wonder "where the hell did I come up with that, and why?" or is it just me...
Mom...very cool job...which reminds me, mine is on her way and my house is still trashed...signing off, have a great weekend all!
Thursday, October 1, 2009
pink
Today is the first day of October...October is National Breast Cancer Awareness Month. I lost my grandmother to breast cancer...both Smash and Betty have undergone numerous surgeries to prevent themselves from becoming a statistic...at least three of the golfergirls are fighting or recovering from the fight to rid their bodies...Alaska's wife is about to undergo yet another 26 week round of a chemo combo so nasty it would have killed ALL the men I know and half of the women. To say breast cancer sucks is an understatement akin to "the sun is hot."
What doesn't suck is less women die within 5 years of being diagnosed with breast cancer now than did 10 years ago, and there is a very real chance that the survival rate for most breast cancers could be as high as 98% by the time my baby girl gets boobies...yeah, I know that's a long shot but my fingers are crossed. I thought I would share a few of the organizations, events, products etc. that either promote awareness or give money to the fight of breast (and other) cancers that I happen to like and endorse and remember: WEAR PINK!
Probably the most well known organization that raises money to fund research is the Susan G. Komen Foundation http://ww5.komen.org/ I participate in a Rally For The Cure Golf Tournament every year, and this year, if I can get my ass in gear, will also participate in a Race For The Cure. They are a ton of fun and most of the money goes to fund research...which is key because if only the drug companies are funding the research a "cure" will never be found...the "treatment" of cancer is far too profitable.
Another organization that is less well known, and not as well funded, but has a far better name: Save The Ta-Tas http://www.savethetatas.com/ they have fantastic tees, tanks, and other stuff that a portion of the proceeds of are given to fund awareness, education, and prevention...and isn't "save the ta tas" just great to say?
I love the "fight like a girl" and "save second base" stuff because it is fun and eye catching...here is a site that carries a bunch: http://www.zazzle.com/pink+ribbon+gifts
Here is one of my favorites because early detection greatly reduces your risk of death and MOST breast cancer, especially in young women, is found by either the woman or her significant other noticing a change and bringing it to the attention of her doctor. FEEL YOUR BOOBIES LADIES...DO IT...and if you don't want to ask a man...they are usually happy to. http://www.feelyourboobies.com/
Take care of the "girls" ladies, and take of you, cuz if you don't you can't take care of your men or your babies...and lawd knows they can't take care of themselves!
What doesn't suck is less women die within 5 years of being diagnosed with breast cancer now than did 10 years ago, and there is a very real chance that the survival rate for most breast cancers could be as high as 98% by the time my baby girl gets boobies...yeah, I know that's a long shot but my fingers are crossed. I thought I would share a few of the organizations, events, products etc. that either promote awareness or give money to the fight of breast (and other) cancers that I happen to like and endorse and remember: WEAR PINK!
Probably the most well known organization that raises money to fund research is the Susan G. Komen Foundation http://ww5.komen.org/ I participate in a Rally For The Cure Golf Tournament every year, and this year, if I can get my ass in gear, will also participate in a Race For The Cure. They are a ton of fun and most of the money goes to fund research...which is key because if only the drug companies are funding the research a "cure" will never be found...the "treatment" of cancer is far too profitable.
Another organization that is less well known, and not as well funded, but has a far better name: Save The Ta-Tas http://www.savethetatas.com/ they have fantastic tees, tanks, and other stuff that a portion of the proceeds of are given to fund awareness, education, and prevention...and isn't "save the ta tas" just great to say?
I love the "fight like a girl" and "save second base" stuff because it is fun and eye catching...here is a site that carries a bunch: http://www.zazzle.com/pink+ribbon+gifts
Here is one of my favorites because early detection greatly reduces your risk of death and MOST breast cancer, especially in young women, is found by either the woman or her significant other noticing a change and bringing it to the attention of her doctor. FEEL YOUR BOOBIES LADIES...DO IT...and if you don't want to ask a man...they are usually happy to. http://www.feelyourboobies.com/
Take care of the "girls" ladies, and take of you, cuz if you don't you can't take care of your men or your babies...and lawd knows they can't take care of themselves!
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