I finally had the ol' mammogram and my boobies hurt a bit. My plan was to go to yoga tonight, but since I felt like at any moment my girls could have fallen off my chest, downward dog was not an option. I decided, instead, to walk with the Pea while she rode her bike. One would think this was just a ho hum occasion...all five year olds ride their bike in the afternoons right? Wrong. The Boy and I slaved over that bike last Christmas Eve...it is a one of a kind, custom, tricked out, kick ass, pink bike...and she rode it ONCE. Christmas day she took it out, took a turn a bit too fast and fell, and somehow smashed her lady parts. It has taken her 10 months to work up the courage to try it again. I can't say I blame her...if in her mind: bike = bruised bits, well...
So, just so happened yesterday, she up and decided it was time. Out of the blue the bike came out of it's resting place and around and around the kitchen she went until she felt like she could handle it without harming herself. Today we ventured outside. Up and down the street she rode, proud of herself and her bike, and not a single lady part was harmed. No southern bits anyway, BUT my northern bits felt like they were sliding off my ribcage and more than once I caught myself holding one in each hand. I was positive when I took off my bra tonight the boobies would come with it...or still be attached but unfurl like tube socks. I'm happy to report neither happened, but I'm wearing a sports bra to bed.
The mammogram itself was, overall, a lot less horrible than I expected. I did some research going in, and made sure to find an imaging clinic that only had the newer "gentler" digital machines, and that, coupled with a really great tech who didn't man handle me, probably made a huge difference. I know Smash, and plenty of other ladies, haven't been so lucky. I also had the good fortune of getting the advice to take some Motrin an hour or so before hand...I never would have thought to do that if my sister hadn't mentioned it.
Since I feel like my experience was made better because going in I knew what to expect, I thought I would share it for any of you out there who haven't had the pleasure of getting your boobies mashed, smashed, and photographed, so that you too, will have a better than average experience.
For starters, do your research and make sure you go digital...ooooh, and another thing, my original appointment was scheduled during a not optimal time of the month....my girls hurt if you looked at them, touching them was out of the question...had I not mustered up the balls to call and reschedule I would have been on the floor in a puddle *shudder* Make sure your appointment is the week AFTER your period, and even if you like 'em man handled by your man, take some Motrin, cuz the machine you can't slap and say "gentle! geez..."
After checking in, and giving them enough personal information for them to easily steal my identity, I headed to the dressing area and stripped from the waist up. I put on a gown, which was cute with my four inch heels (they let you keep your shoes on) and then the tech led me into "the room" which is dominated by "the machine" which essentially looks like a plastic vice grip...a GINORMOUS plastic vice grip. She had me take the gown off on one side and slapped a little metal sticker on my nipple, which was a surprise...no one told me about the sticker. I stepped up to the plate, so to speak, and she lifted my left one onto it. I then had to do a little contortion act with one arm huggin' the machine, the other "relaxed" yeah right, and my head tilted to the side so the top plate (the smasher) wouldn't uppercut me when it unsmashed. I'm GLAD I had on heels cuz I felt like I was being picked up off the ground as the top plate came down. As it came down it simultaneously smooshed and pulled and then there was a click, and I was released. This got repeated 3 more times, with assorted combinations of lifting, mashing, "look up" and "relax." I only had a mild panic attack, and after one short break to sit down with my head between my knees ("you were sweating, shaking, and turning white, bless your heart child!") I was fine. If you can get your blood pressure taken, or watch your dog get a shot, without having a panic attack and passing out (I can not), you will be fine.
After ripping the little metal stickers off my nipples (which I debated just leaving there cuz I KNEW it was gonna smart like hell) I gathered up the girls, poured them into my bra, got myself dressed, and headed out. Had I not had to go back to work I would have gone to the nearest bar and ordered a martini, instead, I hit the nearest Taco Bell and ordered pretty much everything on the menu.
I could have thought of at least three things I would have rather done with my morning, and my boobs, but I am glad I did it. I hope anyone who is told by their doctor that they need one doesn't chicken out like I almost did, because it really isn't all that bad.
I would go ahead and get the martini afterward though, cuz the Taco Bell? Bad...very. bad. idea.
Wednesday, October 26, 2011
Monday, October 24, 2011
more perfect
A few more recipes...
The Pea's Perfect Pumpkin Bread
1 can pumpkin puree (organic if you can find it, but not necessary since you don't eat the skin)
4 eggs (I use vegetarian, cage free)
1/2 cup vegetable oil
1/2 cup applesauce (unsweetened, organic)
2/3 cup water
1 cup sugar
1 cup Truvia
3 cups unbleached, all purpose flour
1/3 cup whole wheat flour
2 teaspoons baking powder
2 teaspoons baking soda
1 1/2 teaspoons salt
3 teaspoons pumpkin pie spice
1 teaspoon Cinnamon
Preheat the oven to 320 for glass pans, 340 for metal (I use glass)
Combine all the dry ingredients and set aside and in another bowl (or if you are like me and don't like to do dishes just form a little well inside the dry ingredients in the same bowl) and beat the eggs, then add oil, applesauce, pumpkin, water, sugar, and Truvia. Mix everything together until well blended and dump it in buttered bread pans (I like to do mini loaves...that way when I eat a whole loaf, it's not so bad).
Bake it till it smells ready and feels firm, about an hour.
K's Kick-Ass Chicken Chili
2 or 3 boneless, skinless chicken breasts (I use vegetarian, cage free)
3 cans white beans (again, organic, if you can find it, drained)
2 bell peppers (organic, any color, I like to use one red, one green, for color, but whatever is fresh and looks good)
1 poblano pepper (or other mild green pepper)
1 jalapeno
1 sweet onion (like a vidalia)
a bunch of garlic (I would use about 4-5 cloves, but not everyone loves garlic like I do)
chicken stock (I like the organic stuff that comes in a box)
pepper
Olive oil
Dice up the peppers, onion, jalapeno (I throw out the pith and the seeds cuz I don't like it crazy hot, but if you do, knock yourself out), garlic, and chicken, and chuck it all in a big saute pan with enough olive oil to cover the bottom of the pan. Saute it up on medium high heat. When everything is nice and caramelized and the chicken is cooked through (it doesn't take long) turn down the heat to low and add the stock, pepper to taste (and salt if you must, but usually stock is salty enough so taste it first) and the beans. If you like it kinda soupy you are done...if you like it thick just let it hang out until it is the right consistency. The water will cook off and the fiber from the beans will thicken it up. I usually let it hang out about 30 minutes...unless I am starving and then I eat it right away.
There ya have it, add a bag of corn chips, a nice dark beer, and the Packers kicking ass, and you are set.
The Pea's Perfect Pumpkin Bread
1 can pumpkin puree (organic if you can find it, but not necessary since you don't eat the skin)
4 eggs (I use vegetarian, cage free)
1/2 cup vegetable oil
1/2 cup applesauce (unsweetened, organic)
2/3 cup water
1 cup sugar
1 cup Truvia
3 cups unbleached, all purpose flour
1/3 cup whole wheat flour
2 teaspoons baking powder
2 teaspoons baking soda
1 1/2 teaspoons salt
3 teaspoons pumpkin pie spice
1 teaspoon Cinnamon
Preheat the oven to 320 for glass pans, 340 for metal (I use glass)
Combine all the dry ingredients and set aside and in another bowl (or if you are like me and don't like to do dishes just form a little well inside the dry ingredients in the same bowl) and beat the eggs, then add oil, applesauce, pumpkin, water, sugar, and Truvia. Mix everything together until well blended and dump it in buttered bread pans (I like to do mini loaves...that way when I eat a whole loaf, it's not so bad).
Bake it till it smells ready and feels firm, about an hour.
K's Kick-Ass Chicken Chili
2 or 3 boneless, skinless chicken breasts (I use vegetarian, cage free)
3 cans white beans (again, organic, if you can find it, drained)
2 bell peppers (organic, any color, I like to use one red, one green, for color, but whatever is fresh and looks good)
1 poblano pepper (or other mild green pepper)
1 jalapeno
1 sweet onion (like a vidalia)
a bunch of garlic (I would use about 4-5 cloves, but not everyone loves garlic like I do)
chicken stock (I like the organic stuff that comes in a box)
pepper
Olive oil
Dice up the peppers, onion, jalapeno (I throw out the pith and the seeds cuz I don't like it crazy hot, but if you do, knock yourself out), garlic, and chicken, and chuck it all in a big saute pan with enough olive oil to cover the bottom of the pan. Saute it up on medium high heat. When everything is nice and caramelized and the chicken is cooked through (it doesn't take long) turn down the heat to low and add the stock, pepper to taste (and salt if you must, but usually stock is salty enough so taste it first) and the beans. If you like it kinda soupy you are done...if you like it thick just let it hang out until it is the right consistency. The water will cook off and the fiber from the beans will thicken it up. I usually let it hang out about 30 minutes...unless I am starving and then I eat it right away.
There ya have it, add a bag of corn chips, a nice dark beer, and the Packers kicking ass, and you are set.
Sunday, October 23, 2011
sunday
Sunday! Sunday! Sunday!
What a difference a day makes. Today is perfect. Again, it is glorious weather, again, there is football on tv, again, the Pea and her little buddy are sitting in the driveway...BUT, today I am not annoyed. Nope, not a bit.
Today, I was able to start the day with my favorite show, CBS Sunday Morning, drink an entire pot of coffee in peace, snuggle with the Pea while the pumpkin bread we made baked in the oven, and get a few things done without ONCE having to stop and yell "STOP YELLING AND BE NICE!"
Ahhh...much better.
So, as most of you know, the Pea and I are gearing up for our Christmas in Disney. In less than two months I will be in my happy place, hemorrhaging money. Since most everything there is a bit on the pricey side, we have to pick and choose what we do, and what we buy. We don't do souvenirs, other than pressed pennies and a photo cd (because I don't need any more plastic shit in my house), we don't buy clothes there (because why would you when you can get Micky shirts at Target for $7), and the Pea knows better than to bother asking for anything being sold by a street vendor.
One place we go all out though, is food...or more specifically, dining experiences. I am a big fan of the "character meal." For those of you who don't know, the character meal is one where specific characters come around the dining room and stop at your table to interact for a few minutes. The only other way to interact with the characters is to stand in line in the parks. Some of the lines go on for DAYS...I don't do lines. Combining my favorite thing: food, with one of the major reasons we go to Disney in the first place: the chance for the Pea to get hugged by a princess, is brilliant, and worth every penny. We are scheduled to do three meals with princesses and one with Pooh Bear. I am actually just as excited as the Pea,Price Charming is nummy because the food is awesome.
I thought I was the only person in love with Disney food (because most people just think it is overpriced and not all that great) until I stumbled on this little gem: http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=2284684
Food Porn. I have been looking at a bunch of it lately. I am so addicted to this form of porn, in fact, that I have already started planning what restaurants to eat at for subsequent trips to the world, because I want to try it ALL. Most of the good restaurants actually do not have characters, so it looks like I am either going to have to start going more often, going without the Pea (which would never work because I would feel so guilty I couldn't eat), or lying and telling her the characters are sick and can't come around whenever we go into a place without them.
I don't think going more often is feasible unless I win the lottery, so I am officially going to start lying to my kid on our next trip. Until then, I have my porn.
My recipe for a perfect day:
Wake upnext to Prince Charming with a perfect cup [pot] of coffee, bake some pumpkin bread, make some chili, chill some beer, turn on a good [any] football game, and during the commercials scroll through some food porn. voila, perfecto!
What a difference a day makes. Today is perfect. Again, it is glorious weather, again, there is football on tv, again, the Pea and her little buddy are sitting in the driveway...BUT, today I am not annoyed. Nope, not a bit.
Today, I was able to start the day with my favorite show, CBS Sunday Morning, drink an entire pot of coffee in peace, snuggle with the Pea while the pumpkin bread we made baked in the oven, and get a few things done without ONCE having to stop and yell "STOP YELLING AND BE NICE!"
Ahhh...much better.
So, as most of you know, the Pea and I are gearing up for our Christmas in Disney. In less than two months I will be in my happy place, hemorrhaging money. Since most everything there is a bit on the pricey side, we have to pick and choose what we do, and what we buy. We don't do souvenirs, other than pressed pennies and a photo cd (because I don't need any more plastic shit in my house), we don't buy clothes there (because why would you when you can get Micky shirts at Target for $7), and the Pea knows better than to bother asking for anything being sold by a street vendor.
One place we go all out though, is food...or more specifically, dining experiences. I am a big fan of the "character meal." For those of you who don't know, the character meal is one where specific characters come around the dining room and stop at your table to interact for a few minutes. The only other way to interact with the characters is to stand in line in the parks. Some of the lines go on for DAYS...I don't do lines. Combining my favorite thing: food, with one of the major reasons we go to Disney in the first place: the chance for the Pea to get hugged by a princess, is brilliant, and worth every penny. We are scheduled to do three meals with princesses and one with Pooh Bear. I am actually just as excited as the Pea,
I thought I was the only person in love with Disney food (because most people just think it is overpriced and not all that great) until I stumbled on this little gem: http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=2284684
Food Porn. I have been looking at a bunch of it lately. I am so addicted to this form of porn, in fact, that I have already started planning what restaurants to eat at for subsequent trips to the world, because I want to try it ALL. Most of the good restaurants actually do not have characters, so it looks like I am either going to have to start going more often, going without the Pea (which would never work because I would feel so guilty I couldn't eat), or lying and telling her the characters are sick and can't come around whenever we go into a place without them.
I don't think going more often is feasible unless I win the lottery, so I am officially going to start lying to my kid on our next trip. Until then, I have my porn.
My recipe for a perfect day:
Wake up
Saturday, October 22, 2011
beer goggles
It is a glorious fall afternoon. The weather could not be more perfect. I have beer in my fridge and football on the TV. The Pea is outside creating a mural, out of sidewalk chalk, in the driveway. I should be happy as a damn clam and loving life, right? Wrong...I am annoyed. I am annoyed because in the driveway with the Pea is her newest bestest friend, who supposedly lives across the street. I say supposedly because it feels like she lives here.
Every day when I get home she is here before I can open my car door and get out. Every night I have to send her home, both her and the Pea kicking and screaming. This morning my doorbell rang at 7:45am. If I hadn't already been up with a pot of coffee brewing I would have lost my damn mind. Twice today I have sent her home because I just want some time with my kid, but since my kid would rather play with her than me, she is back, and I let her.
I worked really hard, and paid a steep price, to set my little world up the way it is, and I am having a hard time letting others in. I only get two Saturdays a month with my little peanut, I really don't want to spend those days babysitting someone elses kid and breaking up arguments. If I have said "stop screaming and play nice!!!!" once, I have said it a THOUSAND times. I don't have to say that when it's just the two of us. Ok, I do, but not nearly as often.
On one hand, I know she wants to play with friends and she needs to develop socially...on the other, I am selfish and want her all to myself. Not to mention that taking care of myownself and MY offspring is hard enough...I really don't need to be taking care of someone else's kid. The kid isn't bad, she doesn't require much, but for some reason it is starting to really rub me the wrong way.
Today the ice cream truck came by and The Pea tore off outside with her purse. Her life savings is $3 (the portion that is hers to spend as she likes, anyway, the rest is going to Disney). It pissed me off to no end that she bought TWO ice creams at a $1.50 each. Pissed. Me. Off. I didn't say anything, just let her do it, and then let them sit outside and eat, but I swear I wanted to snatch the ice cream out of the kid's hand...and then what? It made the Pea happy, she was fine spending her money and sharing, what the hell is wrong with me?
It's not like my Pea hasn't hung out with other people in the neighborhood. For a while she practically lived at "kid paradise" I wonder if the mom over there felt the same way toward the Pea that I do about this little one? I wouldn't have blamed her if she did, but I'm guessing she didn't. Why do I have no tolerance for other people's kids?
Sometimes I feel like a heartless bitch, and I am ashamed of myself. Thank God not all people are like me or we wouldn't have any teachers or pediatricians. I love the Pea so much it scares me; I would spend every moment of every day with her. Even when she pisses me off I want to squeeze her, and would give her my own heart if she needed it, so I know I am capable of loving children, just apparently not other people's children. Although, I do love my nephews, so I dunno...
Beer seems to make me like everybody better...maybe I will just go get one. I know I am one of the guys, but never in my wildest dreams did I think I would need beer goggles to help me deal with a girl.
Every day when I get home she is here before I can open my car door and get out. Every night I have to send her home, both her and the Pea kicking and screaming. This morning my doorbell rang at 7:45am. If I hadn't already been up with a pot of coffee brewing I would have lost my damn mind. Twice today I have sent her home because I just want some time with my kid, but since my kid would rather play with her than me, she is back, and I let her.
I worked really hard, and paid a steep price, to set my little world up the way it is, and I am having a hard time letting others in. I only get two Saturdays a month with my little peanut, I really don't want to spend those days babysitting someone elses kid and breaking up arguments. If I have said "stop screaming and play nice!!!!" once, I have said it a THOUSAND times. I don't have to say that when it's just the two of us. Ok, I do, but not nearly as often.
On one hand, I know she wants to play with friends and she needs to develop socially...on the other, I am selfish and want her all to myself. Not to mention that taking care of myownself and MY offspring is hard enough...I really don't need to be taking care of someone else's kid. The kid isn't bad, she doesn't require much, but for some reason it is starting to really rub me the wrong way.
Today the ice cream truck came by and The Pea tore off outside with her purse. Her life savings is $3 (the portion that is hers to spend as she likes, anyway, the rest is going to Disney). It pissed me off to no end that she bought TWO ice creams at a $1.50 each. Pissed. Me. Off. I didn't say anything, just let her do it, and then let them sit outside and eat, but I swear I wanted to snatch the ice cream out of the kid's hand...and then what? It made the Pea happy, she was fine spending her money and sharing, what the hell is wrong with me?
It's not like my Pea hasn't hung out with other people in the neighborhood. For a while she practically lived at "kid paradise" I wonder if the mom over there felt the same way toward the Pea that I do about this little one? I wouldn't have blamed her if she did, but I'm guessing she didn't. Why do I have no tolerance for other people's kids?
Sometimes I feel like a heartless bitch, and I am ashamed of myself. Thank God not all people are like me or we wouldn't have any teachers or pediatricians. I love the Pea so much it scares me; I would spend every moment of every day with her. Even when she pisses me off I want to squeeze her, and would give her my own heart if she needed it, so I know I am capable of loving children, just apparently not other people's children. Although, I do love my nephews, so I dunno...
Beer seems to make me like everybody better...maybe I will just go get one. I know I am one of the guys, but never in my wildest dreams did I think I would need beer goggles to help me deal with a girl.
Thursday, October 20, 2011
football and pixie dust
I don't get the whole occupy wall street thing...I think all the candidates are off their rocker...I am frightened that our economy is one media frenzy away from collapse.
I have never LIKED watching the news, but now, I can't even look at it. Just seeing the headlines when I sign in to my computer every morning depresses me. I know I am an adult, and I am supposed to care, and have opinions, and be educated in order to cast an educated vote, but with every awful news story I find myself feeling more and more helpless. The world has pretty much always been in a state of turmoil. There have always been bad people, there has always been at least two countries at war, there is always at least one economy near collapse; there has NOT always been a gazillion media conglomerates with the technology to instantly share all that bad news and make money off it.
WHERE IS ALL THE GOOD NEWS?!
There are babies being born and doing cute things every day and yet for some reason the only time I see a baby in the news is if it has disappeared, been brutally killed, or popped out the vagina of a celebrity. I can't see that shit without getting sick to my stomach. I want to see pictures of healthy babies that were born to normal people...I know they are out there.
There are couples getting married every day...happy couples, that actually love each other, and don't have a movie premiering this Friday. I would like to see some happy love stories.
Not all guys going through divorces murder their families and kill themselves, but you would think so if you read the news. I want more stories like this: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2051501/101-uses-ex-wifes-wedding-dress-Husband-turns-pain-divorce-hilarious-new-book.html?ITO=1490 I just happened to stumble on this story because in my haste to exit out of the headlines page, after a third horrifying story flashed across the screen, I clicked on this.
I can't take it anymore. I don't care if I end up sounding like an uneducated moron and vote for an idiot (which is pretty much a given, regardless of who I vote for). Here is what I plan to do (because after all, news is a business and consumer driven and not watching the 6 o'clock or buying newspapers didn't stop it from creeping into my life) I am going to change my default log in page from MSN to igoogle and I am only going to allow things like: the weather, sports, inspirational quotes, news from Disney, or pictures of puppies. If I read any news at all it will be from http://www.theonion.com/ . I will no longer see the horrible headlines, which should keep me from being horrified all day, thinking about them. I won't go to yahoo or aol, and any of my Facebook friends that post links to things that are awful, I will hide from my view.
I know the world is not all football, magic, and pixie dust, but damnit, I want it to be.
I have never LIKED watching the news, but now, I can't even look at it. Just seeing the headlines when I sign in to my computer every morning depresses me. I know I am an adult, and I am supposed to care, and have opinions, and be educated in order to cast an educated vote, but with every awful news story I find myself feeling more and more helpless. The world has pretty much always been in a state of turmoil. There have always been bad people, there has always been at least two countries at war, there is always at least one economy near collapse; there has NOT always been a gazillion media conglomerates with the technology to instantly share all that bad news and make money off it.
WHERE IS ALL THE GOOD NEWS?!
There are babies being born and doing cute things every day and yet for some reason the only time I see a baby in the news is if it has disappeared, been brutally killed, or popped out the vagina of a celebrity. I can't see that shit without getting sick to my stomach. I want to see pictures of healthy babies that were born to normal people...I know they are out there.
There are couples getting married every day...happy couples, that actually love each other, and don't have a movie premiering this Friday. I would like to see some happy love stories.
Not all guys going through divorces murder their families and kill themselves, but you would think so if you read the news. I want more stories like this: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2051501/101-uses-ex-wifes-wedding-dress-Husband-turns-pain-divorce-hilarious-new-book.html?ITO=1490 I just happened to stumble on this story because in my haste to exit out of the headlines page, after a third horrifying story flashed across the screen, I clicked on this.
I can't take it anymore. I don't care if I end up sounding like an uneducated moron and vote for an idiot (which is pretty much a given, regardless of who I vote for). Here is what I plan to do (because after all, news is a business and consumer driven and not watching the 6 o'clock or buying newspapers didn't stop it from creeping into my life) I am going to change my default log in page from MSN to igoogle and I am only going to allow things like: the weather, sports, inspirational quotes, news from Disney, or pictures of puppies. If I read any news at all it will be from http://www.theonion.com/ . I will no longer see the horrible headlines, which should keep me from being horrified all day, thinking about them. I won't go to yahoo or aol, and any of my Facebook friends that post links to things that are awful, I will hide from my view.
I know the world is not all football, magic, and pixie dust, but damnit, I want it to be.
Tuesday, October 18, 2011
tell yours
I got an email tonight requesting information on how to start a blog. This is the third of the sort in the past few weeks, and the fifth or so overall, so I thought I would do a "how to."
For starters, if you are doing a personal blog, like mine, ask yourself "Am I really ready to face my own reality, be honest with the world, and own who I am?" This isn't so important if your blog is about scrapbooking, knitting, or pictures of cats. Blogging is journaling, and if it's fake your readers will figure it out really quick. Not only will your readers figure it out, but you will, and you will lose interest...it's just too damn hard to keep it up when you are trying to be something you aren't (like funny all the time). I fight that now, as I try to balance being real and honest with being too open. When I start writing about random stuff (like flinging poo, for instance) and leave out the personal stuff, I free myself from having to answer questions and face realities that I sometimes would rather not. I also cheat myself, and my readers, of the good stuff...the stuff that binds us all together, makes us human, and makes us real. Ultimately, writing about life enables me to see it in a better light, which helps others, who can identify in some way. Some days I answer the question with "Nope, not today..." and that is ok, but if the answer for you is "Nope, not ever..." then find yourself a nice leather bound journal that you can keep on your bedside table. When your answer is "Ok, I think I can..." proceed.
I happen to like www.blogger.com no surprise there...but there are others. For me blogger was easy. It is pretty user friendly, when they aren't trying to update it, and it walks you through, step by step. You can start writing a few minutes after setting up. You will need a Gmail account, but the rest is up to you. You can set up a profile, or not. There are all kinds of pre-made templates that you can choose from and customize or you can make your own. If you are a writer, and not an artist, the templates are great. If you are creating a professional blog you may want to take it to the next level, but for personal ones, I say: sign on, pick one you like, and start writing.
The next step is determining who, if anyone, you want to know about and read your blog. I have three blogs, two are private. Originally one of the other two I had set up for a few people to read, but I have since closed it...it is my daily pour my heart and soul out, no editing, no holds, balls to the wall, diary, and also serves to house the many posts that have been deleted off of this one (that I refer to as "the crazy blog"). The third is my "dream" blog. It houses ideas, dreams, thoughts, stories, questions, and ramblings. Account settings are VERY important if you don't want random strangers reading your stuff. With Blogger (and I couldn't tell you how it works with others, but I gotta assume very much the same) you can have it open, closed, or custom. With the custom you can allow only certain people (and you have to put in their email addresses) or only blog authors (again I think you have to put in their email) or both. The custom is great if you are just starting and want input from a few people, but want to control who those people are. I would also suggest the closed in the beginning, just so you can get the hang of posting, editing, etc. You would be surprised how brilliant you think you are when you are typing away at 2 a.m. only to come back the next day and think "Oh dear God, why did I write that?! and what the hell point was I trying to make?"
If you want to start a professional, political, business, or technical blog you probably want to keep things modest. Stay away from curly fonts, crazy or trendy colors (unless your blog is about fashion or trends) and off color language. If your blog is just ranting about being a single mom feeling completely out of place in a crazy world that spins way faster than you think it should, go crazy...bright colors, random fonts, a few f-bombs...or not...the point is, it's your blog, make it yours, but if you are trying to win voters or make money, play it safe.
Regarding a name...big sigh. A name can make or break your blog. I admit, I read, or don't read, blogs JUST because they have, or don't have, cool names...what keeps me reading is if they make me laugh, cry, think, or change...but I'm sure there are plenty out there I never gave the chance because it was titled something like "My Thoughts on Life." I happen to be a fan of geographical names (ya think?) because they clue you in to where they take place, and plays on the writers name are good too...if you want your name out there. Don't let not being able to figure out a name hold you back from writing, despite how important it may be down the road. A name can always be changed or added. Start writing, worry about the name later.
Not just the name, but the format, style, layout...everything can be changed. Don't let perfection paralysis stand in your way. When I started I just wrote. I had a few stories in my head that I wanted to get down on paper and MiMi suggested I start online; I didn't even know what a blog was at the time. I googled it when I got home from my session that day and that is what led me to Blogger. I think there were 3 templates to choose from at the time. The name came after the second or third post...telling people (Smash) came a few weeks later...telling the world (ok, my little tiny corner of it) came about a year after that.
Starting, and continuing, my blog has been a great way for me to process my thoughts, tell my stories, face my own fears, keep in touch with others, and create. There have been a few bumps in the road, and it is nothing if not humbling, but I highly recommend it.
Everyone has a story...tell yours.
For starters, if you are doing a personal blog, like mine, ask yourself "Am I really ready to face my own reality, be honest with the world, and own who I am?" This isn't so important if your blog is about scrapbooking, knitting, or pictures of cats. Blogging is journaling, and if it's fake your readers will figure it out really quick. Not only will your readers figure it out, but you will, and you will lose interest...it's just too damn hard to keep it up when you are trying to be something you aren't (like funny all the time). I fight that now, as I try to balance being real and honest with being too open. When I start writing about random stuff (like flinging poo, for instance) and leave out the personal stuff, I free myself from having to answer questions and face realities that I sometimes would rather not. I also cheat myself, and my readers, of the good stuff...the stuff that binds us all together, makes us human, and makes us real. Ultimately, writing about life enables me to see it in a better light, which helps others, who can identify in some way. Some days I answer the question with "Nope, not today..." and that is ok, but if the answer for you is "Nope, not ever..." then find yourself a nice leather bound journal that you can keep on your bedside table. When your answer is "Ok, I think I can..." proceed.
I happen to like www.blogger.com no surprise there...but there are others. For me blogger was easy. It is pretty user friendly, when they aren't trying to update it, and it walks you through, step by step. You can start writing a few minutes after setting up. You will need a Gmail account, but the rest is up to you. You can set up a profile, or not. There are all kinds of pre-made templates that you can choose from and customize or you can make your own. If you are a writer, and not an artist, the templates are great. If you are creating a professional blog you may want to take it to the next level, but for personal ones, I say: sign on, pick one you like, and start writing.
The next step is determining who, if anyone, you want to know about and read your blog. I have three blogs, two are private. Originally one of the other two I had set up for a few people to read, but I have since closed it...it is my daily pour my heart and soul out, no editing, no holds, balls to the wall, diary, and also serves to house the many posts that have been deleted off of this one (that I refer to as "the crazy blog"). The third is my "dream" blog. It houses ideas, dreams, thoughts, stories, questions, and ramblings. Account settings are VERY important if you don't want random strangers reading your stuff. With Blogger (and I couldn't tell you how it works with others, but I gotta assume very much the same) you can have it open, closed, or custom. With the custom you can allow only certain people (and you have to put in their email addresses) or only blog authors (again I think you have to put in their email) or both. The custom is great if you are just starting and want input from a few people, but want to control who those people are. I would also suggest the closed in the beginning, just so you can get the hang of posting, editing, etc. You would be surprised how brilliant you think you are when you are typing away at 2 a.m. only to come back the next day and think "Oh dear God, why did I write that?! and what the hell point was I trying to make?"
If you want to start a professional, political, business, or technical blog you probably want to keep things modest. Stay away from curly fonts, crazy or trendy colors (unless your blog is about fashion or trends) and off color language. If your blog is just ranting about being a single mom feeling completely out of place in a crazy world that spins way faster than you think it should, go crazy...bright colors, random fonts, a few f-bombs...or not...the point is, it's your blog, make it yours, but if you are trying to win voters or make money, play it safe.
Regarding a name...big sigh. A name can make or break your blog. I admit, I read, or don't read, blogs JUST because they have, or don't have, cool names...what keeps me reading is if they make me laugh, cry, think, or change...but I'm sure there are plenty out there I never gave the chance because it was titled something like "My Thoughts on Life." I happen to be a fan of geographical names (ya think?) because they clue you in to where they take place, and plays on the writers name are good too...if you want your name out there. Don't let not being able to figure out a name hold you back from writing, despite how important it may be down the road. A name can always be changed or added. Start writing, worry about the name later.
Not just the name, but the format, style, layout...everything can be changed. Don't let perfection paralysis stand in your way. When I started I just wrote. I had a few stories in my head that I wanted to get down on paper and MiMi suggested I start online; I didn't even know what a blog was at the time. I googled it when I got home from my session that day and that is what led me to Blogger. I think there were 3 templates to choose from at the time. The name came after the second or third post...telling people (Smash) came a few weeks later...telling the world (ok, my little tiny corner of it) came about a year after that.
Starting, and continuing, my blog has been a great way for me to process my thoughts, tell my stories, face my own fears, keep in touch with others, and create. There have been a few bumps in the road, and it is nothing if not humbling, but I highly recommend it.
Everyone has a story...tell yours.
Monday, October 17, 2011
flinging poo
Yesterday, as I was driving home from picking up the Pea, I came up behind a white pick-up truck. This was a nice looking truck, not a beat up work truck. It had some black vinyl letters across the back of the tail gate, in a fancy script, that as I got closer I was able to read.
"No Flinging Poo"
At first I laughed, but then I was kind of perplexed, it got me thinking.
The owner of this vehicle went to some lengths to put this on the truck. This wasn't a "wash me" written in the dirt, or a bumper sticker. These were cut vinyl, which I know, from my brief stint working at a sign shop, take some effort, planning, and money. WHY?
We live in a fairly rural area in NC, but NEVER in all my years here have I ever encountered any one flinging poo. Matter of fact the only time I have ever witnessed it at all was in the monkey habitat at the zoo, and as far as I know, monkeys can't read, so making a sign would be a waste of time.
Was this some sort of metaphor or inside joke?
I dunno...but I thought I would share...and in case any of you have encountered so much flinging of poo that you felt you needed a sign, on your vehicle, in big, bold, black, letters I feel for ya...I'm sorry. I must live a rather blessed life cuz I have just never felt the need.
"No Flinging Poo"
At first I laughed, but then I was kind of perplexed, it got me thinking.
The owner of this vehicle went to some lengths to put this on the truck. This wasn't a "wash me" written in the dirt, or a bumper sticker. These were cut vinyl, which I know, from my brief stint working at a sign shop, take some effort, planning, and money. WHY?
We live in a fairly rural area in NC, but NEVER in all my years here have I ever encountered any one flinging poo. Matter of fact the only time I have ever witnessed it at all was in the monkey habitat at the zoo, and as far as I know, monkeys can't read, so making a sign would be a waste of time.
Was this some sort of metaphor or inside joke?
I dunno...but I thought I would share...and in case any of you have encountered so much flinging of poo that you felt you needed a sign, on your vehicle, in big, bold, black, letters I feel for ya...I'm sorry. I must live a rather blessed life cuz I have just never felt the need.
Saturday, October 15, 2011
good morning! good morning! good morning!
So I started my morning, after I smooched The Boy (yes, we have progressed to smooching) and had some coffee, by reading this: http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/how-to-start-your-morning-5-tips-to-create-more-energy-and-confidence/#more-6710 and while I didn't actually DO any of the things he suggested, it did get me kind of fired up to start the day, and write, and even though it hasn't lead to much writing, I must say I LOVE my new writing area. It is in a corner of my bedroom (which is on the second story of my house) in front of a window. The other night it was nice and cozy, with my little lamp on, and all my cool stuff surrounding me, but today it is much more fun. As I type I can look out the window and spy on see my neighbors in their yards, watch the kids play, and see all the trees, which are starting to change color.
It is an absolutely gorgeous day. Perfect fall weather, and I love fall. The only thing that could make this moment any better is a pumpkin doughnut. I have a nice steamy cup of coffee, but a doughnut would do nicely right about now.
The Pea is with her dad, and my plan for the day is to finish the project I started about a million years ago, the clearing out and organizing of my house. I got a good jump start on the remnants that I had stashed in the guest bedroom last week when I was forced to clear out the room so my Aunt could sleep in it, and now I am finally tackling it. Well, I'm GOING to tackle it, as soon as I get off the computer...and run to Dunkin Donuts...and Target...and...
Well, I will let you know how it goes.
It is an absolutely gorgeous day. Perfect fall weather, and I love fall. The only thing that could make this moment any better is a pumpkin doughnut. I have a nice steamy cup of coffee, but a doughnut would do nicely right about now.
The Pea is with her dad, and my plan for the day is to finish the project I started about a million years ago, the clearing out and organizing of my house. I got a good jump start on the remnants that I had stashed in the guest bedroom last week when I was forced to clear out the room so my Aunt could sleep in it, and now I am finally tackling it. Well, I'm GOING to tackle it, as soon as I get off the computer...and run to Dunkin Donuts...and Target...and...
Well, I will let you know how it goes.
Thursday, October 13, 2011
arrrgghh
Wow...it has been a whole week. A lot has happened. Nothing earth shattering or terribly exciting, but lots of little things that kept me busy (and off the computer). I had visitors this weekend, family from up north, which was awesome. The Pea very much enjoyed having other adults to entertain (it helped they brought gifts) and interact with. I had another few dates with The Boy. I had to spend a day out of town at a class for work. The Pea had an open house at her school. I was finally able to catch up with Dude...and now that I am typing it, it all seems way less busy than it did at the time. Somehow a whole week flew by and yet in just a few sentences I have recapped.
Huh...well then.
One of the things I did last week was make myself a fancy new writing area in my bedroom, complete with a desk, chair, lamp, and assorted "inspirational" items (like my "bitter with baggage seeks same" sign, and "where are we going and why am I in this handbasket?" coaster) and now I have writers block. Maybe I should have just stuck with sitting in bed with my laptop on my lap?
Maybe gearing up for Halloween next week will result in something good to share (I actually bought stuff to decorate the house and the Pea and I are going to be pirates!). Until then...a little look back...hopefully we don't end up with the littlest pissed off pirate that ever there was.
Huh...well then.
One of the things I did last week was make myself a fancy new writing area in my bedroom, complete with a desk, chair, lamp, and assorted "inspirational" items (like my "bitter with baggage seeks same" sign, and "where are we going and why am I in this handbasket?" coaster) and now I have writers block. Maybe I should have just stuck with sitting in bed with my laptop on my lap?
Maybe gearing up for Halloween next week will result in something good to share (I actually bought stuff to decorate the house and the Pea and I are going to be pirates!). Until then...a little look back...hopefully we don't end up with the littlest pissed off pirate that ever there was.
Monday, November 2, 2009
pissedoffedness
I started
Halloween by getting yelled at in the parking lot of a Dunkin Donuts by a woman
with no teeth. Well, ok, she had SOME teeth, just not the ones in the front. Not
sure exactly why she was yelling at me either, something to the effect of "I'll
be out of your way in a minute, damn!" and as far as I was concerned she wasn't
even in my way. I was minding my own business, trying to get the Pea out of her
car seat and she was getting out of her car next to me...anyway, I went home and
flossed...then brushed...then flossed again. I couldn't eat any candy after that
either cuz all I could think of was that scary woman yelling at me and me just
wanting her to shut her mouth. Of course, I would prolly be in general pissed
off all the time if I had no teeth.
Speakin' of pissed off, the Pea ended up being the teeny tiniest most pissed off pumpkin that ever was, later that night. The Pea was a pumpkin for Halloween, and for some reason, a rather irritated one. She wanted to head out about 4pm and when I wouldn't let her she got pissed and stayed that way, there were a few bright spots through the night, but an overall air of pissedoffedness, that coming from less than 30lbs of baby girl, was just plain funny. Dancergirl and her little guy came over, we all had dinner together and then we set out for trick or treating. After a few houses the Pea decided she was done and headed for home, leaving the three of us stunned, and then me running after her. When we got home I thought she would enjoy handing out candy. Instead, whenever someone came to the house she rolled her eyes, stomped to the front door, pointed to the bowl, said "it's right there!" and then left them, a bit stunned, and stomped back to her perch on a bar stool in the kitchen, where she scowled at me while I talked on the phone to Smash.
Sunday was a lazy day for the most part, although we did head to Betty's for the afternoon game and dinner. Luckily by then the Pea was back to her usual happy self, and we had a nice night. This morning I have been fighting to stay motivated to do anything other than go back to bed...I do have to go assemble goodie bags for the Pea's birthday party, and now that I think about it will go do, and since I don't have anything more to report, or anything all that interesting, I will leave you with last years post about goodie boxes... http://crazyincarolina.blogspot.com/2008/11/its-all-about-boxes.html
and then I will go floss again...just for good measure.
Speakin' of pissed off, the Pea ended up being the teeny tiniest most pissed off pumpkin that ever was, later that night. The Pea was a pumpkin for Halloween, and for some reason, a rather irritated one. She wanted to head out about 4pm and when I wouldn't let her she got pissed and stayed that way, there were a few bright spots through the night, but an overall air of pissedoffedness, that coming from less than 30lbs of baby girl, was just plain funny. Dancergirl and her little guy came over, we all had dinner together and then we set out for trick or treating. After a few houses the Pea decided she was done and headed for home, leaving the three of us stunned, and then me running after her. When we got home I thought she would enjoy handing out candy. Instead, whenever someone came to the house she rolled her eyes, stomped to the front door, pointed to the bowl, said "it's right there!" and then left them, a bit stunned, and stomped back to her perch on a bar stool in the kitchen, where she scowled at me while I talked on the phone to Smash.
Sunday was a lazy day for the most part, although we did head to Betty's for the afternoon game and dinner. Luckily by then the Pea was back to her usual happy self, and we had a nice night. This morning I have been fighting to stay motivated to do anything other than go back to bed...I do have to go assemble goodie bags for the Pea's birthday party, and now that I think about it will go do, and since I don't have anything more to report, or anything all that interesting, I will leave you with last years post about goodie boxes... http://crazyincarolina.blogspot.com/2008/11/its-all-about-boxes.html
and then I will go floss again...just for good measure.
Wednesday, October 5, 2011
tonight
I am so over the ridiculous Outrageous emails. I like the concept, but they are just tedious and boring. I DO, however, really like the website http://www.pickthebrain.com/ that I got the whole outrageous email thing from so I will continue to check it. One of the essays on the site today was "If the world ended tomorrow, what would you do tonight?"
Something to think about.
Obviously for the sake of the exercise you actually KNOW it is going to end, because if you didn't you would do exactly what you do any other night and not give it a second thought, but there are plenty of people whose worlds have ended, usually by accident, but sometimes because of a freak medical thing, the day after an ordinary day. So I guess what may be a more important question (cuz lets face it, if we knew there was an asteroid or something headed our way it would be chaos and I for one would be hunkered down in my house, hopefully surrounded by people I loved, looking at old photos, drinking heavily, and squeezing my kid) is: do you end every day at peace with the fact that it may have been your last?
Do the people you love know you love them? Were you kind and thoughtful or is there someone out there whom you owe an apology? Have you accomplished enough in this life to let yourself be happy right here, right now? I think it is safe to say all of us wish we could do more, have more, live more, see more, experience more, and love more, and God willing we will, but what if we don't get that luxury?
I know I could be a better parent, a better friend, a better employee, I could keep my house cleaner (a monkey could keep my house cleaner than I do), I could be in better shape and be more fashionable, but I'm happy just the way I am, and most days I do the best I can with what I have that day. Some days I feel like superwoman and my house is clean, my kid clean, I look and feel great...other days I'm happy to make it to work with pants on and remember to brush my hair, but EVERY DAY my kid feels loved, and I feel lucky.
Tonight all I could muster for dinner was macaroni and cheese, the Pea didn't get a bath, my house is trashed, and I didn't finish the project I'm working on at work...I DID, however, talk to Smash and tell her I love her, go to yoga, and tuck my kiddo into bed, where she promptly fell asleep because she felt safe, secure, and loved...If the world ended tomorrow, I'm ok with what I did tonight.
Something to think about.
Obviously for the sake of the exercise you actually KNOW it is going to end, because if you didn't you would do exactly what you do any other night and not give it a second thought, but there are plenty of people whose worlds have ended, usually by accident, but sometimes because of a freak medical thing, the day after an ordinary day. So I guess what may be a more important question (cuz lets face it, if we knew there was an asteroid or something headed our way it would be chaos and I for one would be hunkered down in my house, hopefully surrounded by people I loved, looking at old photos, drinking heavily, and squeezing my kid) is: do you end every day at peace with the fact that it may have been your last?
Do the people you love know you love them? Were you kind and thoughtful or is there someone out there whom you owe an apology? Have you accomplished enough in this life to let yourself be happy right here, right now? I think it is safe to say all of us wish we could do more, have more, live more, see more, experience more, and love more, and God willing we will, but what if we don't get that luxury?
I know I could be a better parent, a better friend, a better employee, I could keep my house cleaner (a monkey could keep my house cleaner than I do), I could be in better shape and be more fashionable, but I'm happy just the way I am, and most days I do the best I can with what I have that day. Some days I feel like superwoman and my house is clean, my kid clean, I look and feel great...other days I'm happy to make it to work with pants on and remember to brush my hair, but EVERY DAY my kid feels loved, and I feel lucky.
Tonight all I could muster for dinner was macaroni and cheese, the Pea didn't get a bath, my house is trashed, and I didn't finish the project I'm working on at work...I DID, however, talk to Smash and tell her I love her, go to yoga, and tuck my kiddo into bed, where she promptly fell asleep because she felt safe, secure, and loved...If the world ended tomorrow, I'm ok with what I did tonight.
Monday, October 3, 2011
pissed
Yesterday's "outrageous" email was "Do you like to party?" uhm, do fish live in water? What is your point? Well, as she went on to explain, life should be all about partying. Not real parties, which involve booze and debauchery, but rather, little celebrations of all your successes, even the little ones. Ok, live life to the fullest, enjoy it, I got it...and then she somehow switched gears, made a crazy right hand turn, and next thing I know she is talking about language and how using positive versus negative can impact your perception. Wha? Seems to me two different concepts and by smashing them together you have just overloaded my brain and pissed me off...which, coincidentally brings me to the title of today's email "OMG, I am so pissed..." Oooh, yay, maybe a little less hokey. Nope, not so much...matter of fact, so much hokeyness (pretty sure that is not a word, whatever) that instead of trying to regurgitate for you her point (which she took so damn long to get to that I really WAS pissed by the end) I am just going to list a few things that piss me off.
For starters, long rambling emails that talk in circles and use lots of BOLD and CAPITAL and EXCLAMATION POINTS!!!!!!!! and end up stating a point or concept that could be far better received with a few, well said, words or phrases.
School fundraisers. Yup, the Pea came home with her first, of I'm sure a zillion, pamphlets filled with overpriced crap that guilt you into buying (because if you don't, you are a bad parent and OBVIOUSLY don't value education) and get your kid all excited about the possibility of winning some jack-ass toy or prize. I could go to Walmart (and we know how much I love going there) buy both the thing they are selling and the stupid prize she could win if she sells a zillion dollars worth, AND give the school the $20 they will make is she does sell a zillion, and we would all be better off. Hate 'em.
Food that is no where near healthy, not even close, that is marketed towards kids and labeled in a way that makes it SEEM healthy. For instance, Fruit Loops NOW have whole grains and fiber...therefor are a part of a nutritious breakfast. Bull. Shit. The amount of sugar in a single fruit loop is enough to induce a diabetic coma and the amount of fiber is negligible, and sorry, no, having a whole grain or two in the mix doesn't mean it's good for you. Oh, and another one: "All natural" just because it is natural does not mean it is a good idea to put it in your body...cocaine is natural...arsenic and bleach are too.
I'll end my little rant with this one: Dunkin Donuts that don't sell doughnuts...I can't begin to explain how much this pisses me off. I'm sorry but if you have DONUT in your name you MUST SELL DOUGHNUTS. I realize that the whole "America Runs on Dunkin" is about marketing your coffee, and you make more money off selling coffee than you do selling little crack cakes, but when I am craving a pumpkin doughnut, and I see a very recognizable sign that indicates there are going to be those little pieces of heaven inside, and I pull off the road, park my car, walk inside and find ONLY... coffee...well. They say hell hath no fury like a woman scorned, but I say "hell hath no fury like me, when I want a damn doughnut."
For starters, long rambling emails that talk in circles and use lots of BOLD and CAPITAL and EXCLAMATION POINTS!!!!!!!! and end up stating a point or concept that could be far better received with a few, well said, words or phrases.
School fundraisers. Yup, the Pea came home with her first, of I'm sure a zillion, pamphlets filled with overpriced crap that guilt you into buying (because if you don't, you are a bad parent and OBVIOUSLY don't value education) and get your kid all excited about the possibility of winning some jack-ass toy or prize. I could go to Walmart (and we know how much I love going there) buy both the thing they are selling and the stupid prize she could win if she sells a zillion dollars worth, AND give the school the $20 they will make is she does sell a zillion, and we would all be better off. Hate 'em.
Food that is no where near healthy, not even close, that is marketed towards kids and labeled in a way that makes it SEEM healthy. For instance, Fruit Loops NOW have whole grains and fiber...therefor are a part of a nutritious breakfast. Bull. Shit. The amount of sugar in a single fruit loop is enough to induce a diabetic coma and the amount of fiber is negligible, and sorry, no, having a whole grain or two in the mix doesn't mean it's good for you. Oh, and another one: "All natural" just because it is natural does not mean it is a good idea to put it in your body...cocaine is natural...arsenic and bleach are too.
I'll end my little rant with this one: Dunkin Donuts that don't sell doughnuts...I can't begin to explain how much this pisses me off. I'm sorry but if you have DONUT in your name you MUST SELL DOUGHNUTS. I realize that the whole "America Runs on Dunkin" is about marketing your coffee, and you make more money off selling coffee than you do selling little crack cakes, but when I am craving a pumpkin doughnut, and I see a very recognizable sign that indicates there are going to be those little pieces of heaven inside, and I pull off the road, park my car, walk inside and find ONLY... coffee...well. They say hell hath no fury like a woman scorned, but I say "hell hath no fury like me, when I want a damn doughnut."
Saturday, October 1, 2011
outrageous
The one great thing that came out of the Break-Up Guide was: it got me writing. Every day it gave me something to think about, write about, and DO. I have started another 30 day "guide" in hopes that it too will get me thinking, and get me writing.
I stumbled on this website (and this is the page that today's email directed me to): http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/do-one-outrageous-thing-this-weekend-youll-feel-great/ and at the bottom came a pop up to subscribe to 30 days toward outrageous thinking, so I did. So far the emails have been a little hokey, but the message is good, and I am on board. The "assignment" this weekend is to do ONE thing for someone else...one act of kindness...to quote the email:
You don't have to save the world to do your part. One kind word or even a smile goes a long way. (It doesn't even have to be someone you "know")
Pay attention to the people you meet this week. Be aware of all the opportunities you have to put out just a little more love than you do normally.
I am also gonna share a little quote that I like, that I sometimes read to myself when I am feeling like I am not doing what it is I should be in this life...when I am feeling like a failure, or like I am not good enough...when someone else's accomplishment makes me sad for myself instead of happy for them...when I need to remind myself that success is relative, and comes in many ways:
To laugh often and much, to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children, to earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends, to appreciate beauty, to find the best in others, to leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch...to know even ONE life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded. - Emerson
So join me, on this little journey, and who knows, maybe in 30 days we will all be changed for the better...OR we will all be bored to death and I will start another 30 day guide, with each day being a link to a better, funnier blog.
I stumbled on this website (and this is the page that today's email directed me to): http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/do-one-outrageous-thing-this-weekend-youll-feel-great/ and at the bottom came a pop up to subscribe to 30 days toward outrageous thinking, so I did. So far the emails have been a little hokey, but the message is good, and I am on board. The "assignment" this weekend is to do ONE thing for someone else...one act of kindness...to quote the email:
You don't have to save the world to do your part. One kind word or even a smile goes a long way. (It doesn't even have to be someone you "know")
Pay attention to the people you meet this week. Be aware of all the opportunities you have to put out just a little more love than you do normally.
I am also gonna share a little quote that I like, that I sometimes read to myself when I am feeling like I am not doing what it is I should be in this life...when I am feeling like a failure, or like I am not good enough...when someone else's accomplishment makes me sad for myself instead of happy for them...when I need to remind myself that success is relative, and comes in many ways:
To laugh often and much, to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children, to earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends, to appreciate beauty, to find the best in others, to leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch...to know even ONE life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded. - Emerson
So join me, on this little journey, and who knows, maybe in 30 days we will all be changed for the better...OR we will all be bored to death and I will start another 30 day guide, with each day being a link to a better, funnier blog.
Thursday, September 29, 2011
moving on
The Break Up Guide has disappeared off of the Frisky. I’m not sure if they are having technical difficulties or they just decided it was old news and have moved on, but I can’t get to it, so I am not sure what I am supposed to be doing. I THINK it is watch a movie with a kick ass female role. Yesterday was Call Your Dad. The only other ones I remember are: Masturbate and Move On.
I think I will just lump all of them together and consider this the last day. I don’t know that I will have time to watch a movie, but I AM going to go watch a senior cheerleading competition tonight. I think watching real women, over the age of 55, get out there and compete, in of all things cheerleading, is pretty kick ass…then I will find BOB…then I will go to bed, and start fresh tomorrow.
I have washed my hands of the old relationship and I am ready to move on. I MAY be moving on with The Boy, but I won’t be going BACK. The relationship I ended almost a month ago is done, and it’s for the best. If we can start over, be better people, and better to each other, than great, but neither one of us wants to just settle back into old routines, or old habits.
Over the last month I have established, and stuck to, a really good routine with the Pea, and we both have benefited. I have started taking yoga again and am feeling strong and grounded. I have stopped worrying so much, started writing more, and am laughing again (both at myself, and this crazy world I live in) and if it took my relationship imploding to force me to do all that, than it obviously needed to happen.
Where I go from here is anyone’s guess, but I’m excited to see how it unfolds, and will keep you all posted.
I think I will just lump all of them together and consider this the last day. I don’t know that I will have time to watch a movie, but I AM going to go watch a senior cheerleading competition tonight. I think watching real women, over the age of 55, get out there and compete, in of all things cheerleading, is pretty kick ass…then I will find BOB…then I will go to bed, and start fresh tomorrow.
I have washed my hands of the old relationship and I am ready to move on. I MAY be moving on with The Boy, but I won’t be going BACK. The relationship I ended almost a month ago is done, and it’s for the best. If we can start over, be better people, and better to each other, than great, but neither one of us wants to just settle back into old routines, or old habits.
Over the last month I have established, and stuck to, a really good routine with the Pea, and we both have benefited. I have started taking yoga again and am feeling strong and grounded. I have stopped worrying so much, started writing more, and am laughing again (both at myself, and this crazy world I live in) and if it took my relationship imploding to force me to do all that, than it obviously needed to happen.
Where I go from here is anyone’s guess, but I’m excited to see how it unfolds, and will keep you all posted.
Tuesday, September 27, 2011
a squirrel, a bat, and a crack pipe
Well yesterday was fix something, and today was cook dinner...I did neither. There is a part of me completely over the whole break-up guide and keeping it going is just giving me one more thing to do on my way too long to do list. There is another part of me that feels like I need to keep on keepin' on, because I need to force some space between me and The Boy. We have been talking a lot lately, spending some time together, and talking about a future back together. Everyone, except us, seems to be against the idea, so I am trying hard to take a step back and make sure that if I jump back in it is because it is the right thing to do, and not because I am lonely [horny] or feeling fat [old] and scared of dying alone with a hundred cats.
So switching gears a bit...squirrel! Did ya read the story about the kindergartner who brought a crack pipe and some meth to school for show and tell? Guess mama didn't read the 2 page rule sheet that got sent home regarding show and tell...silly woman. Thought I would re-run this oldie...
So switching gears a bit...squirrel! Did ya read the story about the kindergartner who brought a crack pipe and some meth to school for show and tell? Guess mama didn't read the 2 page rule sheet that got sent home regarding show and tell...silly woman. Thought I would re-run this oldie...
Tuesday, October 7, 2008
rabid bats
So you know those news headlines that pop up when
you sign online? You can click on them to read the whole story...well this
morning one of them caught my eye "Mom brings rabid bat to school." I read the
story...turns out mom decided a dead rabid bat would be the perfect
thing to bring in for show and tell...why of course! Long story short all 90
kids who touched the damn thing have to get a rabies series at a cost - to the
school - of $70k...ooopsie. Got me thinkin'...what else should one NOT bring in
to school for show and tell...you would think these would be common sense, but
then again...
Dead rabid bunnies, dogs, cats, mice...oh you name it, pretty much any dead animal, probably not a good idea...come to think of it, LIVE rabid animals also NOT a good idea.
Poisonous snakes, like rattlers, copperheads, water moccasins, coral snakes...poisonous spiders too, especially in open containers, those little suckers tend to be quick and can get away from you before you know it.
Shotguns, pistols...weapons in general, although you might could get away with a stun gun...flame throwers and anti-aircraft missiles are especially cumbersome and would just be a pain.
Chemicals, nuclear waste, toxic/hazardous materials...these have to be marked and identified in very specific ways which is just a drag AND they can be stinky and messy...kids tend to be stinky and messy enough on their own.
Think that covers most of the biggies, OH, and razor blades, broken glass, heroin, porn...well you can bring the porn, but only for the teachers.
Dead rabid bunnies, dogs, cats, mice...oh you name it, pretty much any dead animal, probably not a good idea...come to think of it, LIVE rabid animals also NOT a good idea.
Poisonous snakes, like rattlers, copperheads, water moccasins, coral snakes...poisonous spiders too, especially in open containers, those little suckers tend to be quick and can get away from you before you know it.
Shotguns, pistols...weapons in general, although you might could get away with a stun gun...flame throwers and anti-aircraft missiles are especially cumbersome and would just be a pain.
Chemicals, nuclear waste, toxic/hazardous materials...these have to be marked and identified in very specific ways which is just a drag AND they can be stinky and messy...kids tend to be stinky and messy enough on their own.
Think that covers most of the biggies, OH, and razor blades, broken glass, heroin, porn...well you can bring the porn, but only for the teachers.
Sunday, September 25, 2011
ladies day out
Day 15: Host a Ladies Only Night.
Does going out to eat with my kiddo, who is a little lady, and then crashing at 9pm count? Cuz that is what I did last night. We got up nice and early this morning though and cruised into Washington, scored a killer parking spot right in front of the Museum of Natural History, and spent the first part of the day wandering. Just as I wanted to, I let the Pea take charge, take pictures, and lead the way. Yes, we did a lot of backtracking; yes, we missed some of the exhibits; yes, the cafe served wine, but turned out I didn't need it...I rather enjoyed our little adventure.
Here are some of her pictures:
Took her a few to get the hang of it, but I think she did pretty good. I didn't include the 20 or so of me driving, the 15 or so fuzzy dark ones of what I am not sure, or the 3 of my butt.
Today is supposed to be sign up for a class. I don't think I need to spend any more time away from the Pea than I already do, so not gonna, BUT, I will be taking a yoga class every week now, so let's just count that and move on.
Does going out to eat with my kiddo, who is a little lady, and then crashing at 9pm count? Cuz that is what I did last night. We got up nice and early this morning though and cruised into Washington, scored a killer parking spot right in front of the Museum of Natural History, and spent the first part of the day wandering. Just as I wanted to, I let the Pea take charge, take pictures, and lead the way. Yes, we did a lot of backtracking; yes, we missed some of the exhibits; yes, the cafe served wine, but turned out I didn't need it...I rather enjoyed our little adventure.
Here are some of her pictures:
Took her a few to get the hang of it, but I think she did pretty good. I didn't include the 20 or so of me driving, the 15 or so fuzzy dark ones of what I am not sure, or the 3 of my butt.
Today is supposed to be sign up for a class. I don't think I need to spend any more time away from the Pea than I already do, so not gonna, BUT, I will be taking a yoga class every week now, so let's just count that and move on.
Friday, September 23, 2011
lessons
A few lessons for the day:
1) Feel your boobies, then get someone else to feel your boobies. I missed a lump, luckily, during my annual grope and feel (aka annual exam), my doctor found it. Now I get to go get a squish and flatten (aka mammogram) which I am not looking forward to, but is obviously necessary. I, clearly, was not thorough enough, because as soon as she felt it, I did too, but somehow yesterday, I missed it...I suspect I am not the only one who has done this, so I guess it is safe to say you can't have too many people feeling your boobies.
2) Chatting up little girls is really quite fun. This was my assignment for the day via the Frisky and since I have the pleasure of chatting up the Pea on a regular basis I tried to change things up a bit and ask questions I normally wouldn't have, and listen better than I normally do. She is a riot. We did a lot of driving today and for most of it she talked. I found out you can keep a cow in a cardboard box, as long as it is in the back of a pick-up truck; pink is the best color, even though it isn't in the rainbow; you can't have flowers or rainbows without rain, and umbrellas are fun, so rainy days are AWESOME (I won't ever bitch about the rain again); powdered doughnuts, because they are messier, are better than pumpkin doughnuts (I disagree); doctor's offices are fun (again, I disagree) and we need to have more adventures (on this one I agree, wholeheartedly).
3) Sometimes just hearing about someone else's job makes you LOVE yours. I don't make a lot of money, I don't have any prestige, I am not using my degree, and I don't cure or save people. I am OK with it...why? Because I have ZERO stress, the people I work with appreciate me (or at least seem too), I make enough money that I am comfortable, and most importantly: it affords me the time I need to take care of myself and the Pea. Do I wish I was independently wealthy and could be at home all day every day? YES, however, as far as jobs go, since I do need one, I can't complain.
The Pea and I are going on an adventure this weekend...remember how I said we were going to the museum? Well, why go to the local one when you can go to The Smithsonian? Baby girl wants adventure, Mama wants out of town, Booya to the rescue. He needs a ride to Virginia, I have a car, why the hell not?
1) Feel your boobies, then get someone else to feel your boobies. I missed a lump, luckily, during my annual grope and feel (aka annual exam), my doctor found it. Now I get to go get a squish and flatten (aka mammogram) which I am not looking forward to, but is obviously necessary. I, clearly, was not thorough enough, because as soon as she felt it, I did too, but somehow yesterday, I missed it...I suspect I am not the only one who has done this, so I guess it is safe to say you can't have too many people feeling your boobies.
2) Chatting up little girls is really quite fun. This was my assignment for the day via the Frisky and since I have the pleasure of chatting up the Pea on a regular basis I tried to change things up a bit and ask questions I normally wouldn't have, and listen better than I normally do. She is a riot. We did a lot of driving today and for most of it she talked. I found out you can keep a cow in a cardboard box, as long as it is in the back of a pick-up truck; pink is the best color, even though it isn't in the rainbow; you can't have flowers or rainbows without rain, and umbrellas are fun, so rainy days are AWESOME (I won't ever bitch about the rain again); powdered doughnuts, because they are messier, are better than pumpkin doughnuts (I disagree); doctor's offices are fun (again, I disagree) and we need to have more adventures (on this one I agree, wholeheartedly).
3) Sometimes just hearing about someone else's job makes you LOVE yours. I don't make a lot of money, I don't have any prestige, I am not using my degree, and I don't cure or save people. I am OK with it...why? Because I have ZERO stress, the people I work with appreciate me (or at least seem too), I make enough money that I am comfortable, and most importantly: it affords me the time I need to take care of myself and the Pea. Do I wish I was independently wealthy and could be at home all day every day? YES, however, as far as jobs go, since I do need one, I can't complain.
The Pea and I are going on an adventure this weekend...remember how I said we were going to the museum? Well, why go to the local one when you can go to The Smithsonian? Baby girl wants adventure, Mama wants out of town, Booya to the rescue. He needs a ride to Virginia, I have a car, why the hell not?
Thursday, September 22, 2011
12 & 13
Day 12: Embrace your inner girly girl
The Frisky suggests doing this by wearing pink. Ok, well, yesterday was day 12, and I forgot to wear pink; I decided to change day 12 to "Embrace your girly GIRLS" and give myself an exam. I have been rather slack about feeling my boobies lately, and with October approaching, and the whole pink thing, I think it fits the bill. No lumps, whew, but to all you reading: FEEL YOUR BOOBIES...and while you are at it, take a look at your skin too. Skin cancer is the most common cancer in the US...breast cancer is the most common among women, and while lung cancer is the most deadly, there isn't a self exam for that one.
Day 13: Write a letter to your best friend.
If I rally and get off this computer I will write Smash, if I don't, I will do it over the weekend. I wanted to quote the Frisky on this one though, because I couldn't have said it better:
Buy an actual stamp, and put the addressed envelope into an actual mailbox. You’ll be bawling into five separate Kleenexes by the end of this exercise, but you’ll also have a handle on the ingredients for the glue that holds a good relationship together. Gentleness. Trust. Unconditional love. Honesty. Forgiveness...Why expect less out of your lover than you do a best friend? Sit with that thought for a moment.
It took Smash and I awhile to develop the relationship we do now. There was some trial and error, a few hiccups along the way, but now we have a fantastic relationship, and it does indeed have those 5 ingedients.
The Boy and I have been talking some, and despite having said initially I would NEVER give him another chance, there is a voice inside my head saying "never say never." I will take the above to heart as we proceed forward, starting with forgiveness, working on the gentleness and trust, and not accepting anything other than honesty and unconditional love.
The Frisky suggests doing this by wearing pink. Ok, well, yesterday was day 12, and I forgot to wear pink; I decided to change day 12 to "Embrace your girly GIRLS" and give myself an exam. I have been rather slack about feeling my boobies lately, and with October approaching, and the whole pink thing, I think it fits the bill. No lumps, whew, but to all you reading: FEEL YOUR BOOBIES...and while you are at it, take a look at your skin too. Skin cancer is the most common cancer in the US...breast cancer is the most common among women, and while lung cancer is the most deadly, there isn't a self exam for that one.
Day 13: Write a letter to your best friend.
If I rally and get off this computer I will write Smash, if I don't, I will do it over the weekend. I wanted to quote the Frisky on this one though, because I couldn't have said it better:
Buy an actual stamp, and put the addressed envelope into an actual mailbox. You’ll be bawling into five separate Kleenexes by the end of this exercise, but you’ll also have a handle on the ingredients for the glue that holds a good relationship together. Gentleness. Trust. Unconditional love. Honesty. Forgiveness...Why expect less out of your lover than you do a best friend? Sit with that thought for a moment.
It took Smash and I awhile to develop the relationship we do now. There was some trial and error, a few hiccups along the way, but now we have a fantastic relationship, and it does indeed have those 5 ingedients.
The Boy and I have been talking some, and despite having said initially I would NEVER give him another chance, there is a voice inside my head saying "never say never." I will take the above to heart as we proceed forward, starting with forgiveness, working on the gentleness and trust, and not accepting anything other than honesty and unconditional love.
Tuesday, September 20, 2011
pixie dust
Start a “Go to Hell” Fund
A “go to hell” fund (as often referenced in the personal finance blogosphere) is a nice nest egg of quick cash that’s at your disposal in case you want to, for example, quit a job you hate, get out of a terrible roommate situation, or relocate due to a relationship gone bad (ahem). It’s also known as a “freedom fund”—freedom to leave a situation if you need to or escape anyone who’s screwing you over. Having four to six months’ worth of living expenses at your disposal is ideal.
Welllll, lucky for me, after going through a yucko divorce and AT THE SAME TIME yucko job loss (that was NOT a good year) and depleting all my funds and feeling completely helpless, the very FIRST thing I did when I got back on my feet was start a savings account and start drafting money into that account every other week. My "go to hell fund" is actually pretty fat right now, or rather, it WAS...tee hee. Why go to hell when you can go to the happiest place on earth? That's right...using the fund to go to Disney...every year until the Pea refuses to go along. Disney is now a line item in my budget and I intend to keep it that way. I know the mouse doesn't need my money, but I need the magic, and I need something to look forward to. The Pea and I also need a tradition. Since holidays are split with DH and alternate from year to year, and we don't have a family lake house or anything that we go to, we need something. Traditions are important, they are comforting, and they make you feel like a kid again when you get older.
I don't need to fund my freedom, I already have it (and I paid for it, in full) what I need is happy memories, time with my kiddo, and a little bit of pixie dust...and like freedom, pixie dust aint cheap.
A “go to hell” fund (as often referenced in the personal finance blogosphere) is a nice nest egg of quick cash that’s at your disposal in case you want to, for example, quit a job you hate, get out of a terrible roommate situation, or relocate due to a relationship gone bad (ahem). It’s also known as a “freedom fund”—freedom to leave a situation if you need to or escape anyone who’s screwing you over. Having four to six months’ worth of living expenses at your disposal is ideal.
Welllll, lucky for me, after going through a yucko divorce and AT THE SAME TIME yucko job loss (that was NOT a good year) and depleting all my funds and feeling completely helpless, the very FIRST thing I did when I got back on my feet was start a savings account and start drafting money into that account every other week. My "go to hell fund" is actually pretty fat right now, or rather, it WAS...tee hee. Why go to hell when you can go to the happiest place on earth? That's right...using the fund to go to Disney...every year until the Pea refuses to go along. Disney is now a line item in my budget and I intend to keep it that way. I know the mouse doesn't need my money, but I need the magic, and I need something to look forward to. The Pea and I also need a tradition. Since holidays are split with DH and alternate from year to year, and we don't have a family lake house or anything that we go to, we need something. Traditions are important, they are comforting, and they make you feel like a kid again when you get older.
I don't need to fund my freedom, I already have it (and I paid for it, in full) what I need is happy memories, time with my kiddo, and a little bit of pixie dust...and like freedom, pixie dust aint cheap.
Monday, September 19, 2011
perspective
day 10: Stop watching crap reality TV and change your perspective by taking in some art.
Well, all good in theory, and I DO have my TV off, even though I REEEAAAALY want to watch that episode of The Real Housewives that is in my DVR, but the art museum here is open from 10-5...what am I doing from 10-5? Working. Yeah, I would love to scamper off to a museum and chill a bit while looking at great art...
pause for a sec to look at one of my favorite pieces:
...but I can't, because baby girl needs shoes, and clothes, and a roof over her head, and food, and trips to Disney World, and I couldn't exactly provide all that if I were hanging out in museums instead of at my desk. So what's a girl to do? Nothing. Nothing today anyway, but I think I have a plan for Saturday now. The Pea and I are going to go to the museum, and I am going to challenge myself to follow her lead, and see it from HER perspective.
I have a tendency of planning everything I do for the sake of efficiency. If I go anywhere...the mall, Target, a museum, a theme park...I am essentially on a mission. I hate backtracking, I always go counterclockwise, and I hussle, I move fast. If she wants to backtrack, we will backtrack...if she wants to go clockwise, well then we will...and if she wants to stop to look at a tree and completely ignore the sculpture standing next to it, well then that is what we will do. I will get out of my comfort zone of structure, I will NOT look at the map, I will bite my lip when I want to say "hurry up" and I will NOT get anxious when it becomes clear that we will not be seeing everything...I will enjoy the day, and just being there...I will, I really will *fingers crossed*...I sure hope they serve wine in the cafe.
Well, all good in theory, and I DO have my TV off, even though I REEEAAAALY want to watch that episode of The Real Housewives that is in my DVR, but the art museum here is open from 10-5...what am I doing from 10-5? Working. Yeah, I would love to scamper off to a museum and chill a bit while looking at great art...
pause for a sec to look at one of my favorite pieces:
I have a tendency of planning everything I do for the sake of efficiency. If I go anywhere...the mall, Target, a museum, a theme park...I am essentially on a mission. I hate backtracking, I always go counterclockwise, and I hussle, I move fast. If she wants to backtrack, we will backtrack...if she wants to go clockwise, well then we will...and if she wants to stop to look at a tree and completely ignore the sculpture standing next to it, well then that is what we will do. I will get out of my comfort zone of structure, I will NOT look at the map, I will bite my lip when I want to say "hurry up" and I will NOT get anxious when it becomes clear that we will not be seeing everything...I will enjoy the day, and just being there...I will, I really will *fingers crossed*...I sure hope they serve wine in the cafe.
Sunday, September 18, 2011
books
Well, last night was fun...the weather, which was kinda crappy, and my nose, which was kinda stuffy, prevented me from having a bang up good time, but it was good to get out, hang with good people, and have a few beers. I'm not doing much of anything today, even though my house needs attention and my clothes need washing. Today I am going to stay in bed and read...just so happens today is day 9 and day 9 is read a book you loved as a little girl.
The Frisky suggests going to the library and finding a book you loved as a kid and re-reading it. It is Sunday, so the Library is closed, and I'm not much up for heading out to a bookstore, so I grabbed a few books out of my bookcase.
Here are my choices, you can click on the titles for a link to Amazon.
Oh, The Places You'll Go
The Blue Day Book
Lulu Atlantis And The Quest For True Blue Love
The Frisky suggests going to the library and finding a book you loved as a kid and re-reading it. It is Sunday, so the Library is closed, and I'm not much up for heading out to a bookstore, so I grabbed a few books out of my bookcase.
Here are my choices, you can click on the titles for a link to Amazon.
Oh, The Places You'll Go
The Blue Day Book
Lulu Atlantis And The Quest For True Blue Love
Saturday, September 17, 2011
stuffy
Day 8 update...
Didn't find a dress, or a cute top, or anything that screams "look at me!" but I did have a nice lunch and got SexyLegs all caught up.
I think I am coming down with a cold, which given that I have been stressed out and not eating is not surprising, BUT sure does SUCK.
I am going out tonight, and I AM going to have fun...stuffy nose be damned. Hmmm, who knows what goes in a hot toddy and more importantly, can I put it in a wine glass?
Didn't find a dress, or a cute top, or anything that screams "look at me!" but I did have a nice lunch and got SexyLegs all caught up.
I think I am coming down with a cold, which given that I have been stressed out and not eating is not surprising, BUT sure does SUCK.
I am going out tonight, and I AM going to have fun...stuffy nose be damned. Hmmm, who knows what goes in a hot toddy and more importantly, can I put it in a wine glass?
day 8
Alrighty...the box is packed and stuffed in the guest bedroom. There was surprisingly little to pack away given that we were together almost two years...just another reminder of how NOT invested we really were.
Today is day 8: go out and buy a "look at me" dress.
As soon as I can get off this computer, I am going to get ready. I'm meeting SexyLegs for lunch and then we are going shopping; I'm gonna buy something that looks fabulous on me. I'm excited.
Today is day 8: go out and buy a "look at me" dress.
As soon as I can get off this computer, I am going to get ready. I'm meeting SexyLegs for lunch and then we are going shopping; I'm gonna buy something that looks fabulous on me. I'm excited.
Friday, September 16, 2011
the box
Get a box, any box, and box up his crap.
It has been a very long, very busy day, and on top of the craziness at work I had the every other Friday three hour drive to take the Pea to her dad. Not only is it long and tiring, but letting her go bums me out...I just got home and ALL I want to do is crawl into bed with a glass of wine. The LAST thing I want to do is start going around the house looking for HIS stuff and boxing it up. The few things he has here (random toiletries, a toothbrush, a razor, some clothes) have become part of the background and I don't really see them anymore...actively seeking them out, touching them, smelling them (yeah, I'm one of those people that smells everything) will just make me think about him more, just think about all that we COULD have been, all the times he let me down, etc. etc. and I will just get sad.
Right now sad is not an option.
Tomorrow, when I have more energy, it will be another story. Tomorrow, it's all about the box.
It has been a very long, very busy day, and on top of the craziness at work I had the every other Friday three hour drive to take the Pea to her dad. Not only is it long and tiring, but letting her go bums me out...I just got home and ALL I want to do is crawl into bed with a glass of wine. The LAST thing I want to do is start going around the house looking for HIS stuff and boxing it up. The few things he has here (random toiletries, a toothbrush, a razor, some clothes) have become part of the background and I don't really see them anymore...actively seeking them out, touching them, smelling them (yeah, I'm one of those people that smells everything) will just make me think about him more, just think about all that we COULD have been, all the times he let me down, etc. etc. and I will just get sad.
Right now sad is not an option.
Tomorrow, when I have more energy, it will be another story. Tomorrow, it's all about the box.
day 6
Day 6 was go grocery shopping...well, I didn't, and then I had technical difficulties trying to get signed into blogger last night so instead of writing about grocery shopping, I drank a glass of wine and went to bed. Here is day 6 from last time...
Monday, July 6, 2009
single shopping
Day 6: Congratulations: You’ve got your fridge back. Go Grocery Shopping, you’re single now, and you can buy what you want.
I think this is great...one of the things I LOVE about being single is having my fridge to myself. I don't have to "meal plan" or keep certain things stocked...no one ever complains that the box of wine takes up too much room, I buy what I want, when I want, and since I have been out on my own I have NEVER once heard the phrase "we don't have anything good to eat" uttered in my house. I especially love that I don't have to remember "his" bread or "his" peanut butter or "his" milk anymore, cuz the Pea and I BOTH eat wheat, all natural creamy with honey, and organic 2%, so there is no double stocking of anything.
In addition to having my fridge back, some other things that I am glad I no longer have to share: The toilet...boys are gross, boys miss, boys make messes and don't clean them up, it blows my mind that I don't have to scrub the toilet every week like I used to, and it is great. I was lucky enough that I never had to share my sink with DH, but now I have 2 all to myself...LOVE IT. The garage...it is all mine, mine, mine, mine...just for my little car and all my crap...if I want to leave the stroller, and my golf clubs, and the dirty laundry, by the door, I can, and no one complains.
So, I told Booya to go out shopping, not just grocery, but clothes, or tools, or whatever strikes his man fancy, buy some stuff that she would think gross, or roll her eyes at, and last I heard he was headed out...should be interesting
I think this is great...one of the things I LOVE about being single is having my fridge to myself. I don't have to "meal plan" or keep certain things stocked...no one ever complains that the box of wine takes up too much room, I buy what I want, when I want, and since I have been out on my own I have NEVER once heard the phrase "we don't have anything good to eat" uttered in my house. I especially love that I don't have to remember "his" bread or "his" peanut butter or "his" milk anymore, cuz the Pea and I BOTH eat wheat, all natural creamy with honey, and organic 2%, so there is no double stocking of anything.
In addition to having my fridge back, some other things that I am glad I no longer have to share: The toilet...boys are gross, boys miss, boys make messes and don't clean them up, it blows my mind that I don't have to scrub the toilet every week like I used to, and it is great. I was lucky enough that I never had to share my sink with DH, but now I have 2 all to myself...LOVE IT. The garage...it is all mine, mine, mine, mine...just for my little car and all my crap...if I want to leave the stroller, and my golf clubs, and the dirty laundry, by the door, I can, and no one complains.
So, I told Booya to go out shopping, not just grocery, but clothes, or tools, or whatever strikes his man fancy, buy some stuff that she would think gross, or roll her eyes at, and last I heard he was headed out...should be interesting
Wednesday, September 14, 2011
planning
Today, you’re going to plan to get the hell out of Dodge.
Roger, that.
I have no problem planning a trip. I plan trips all the damn time. I spend more time planning vacations than I actually spend ON vacation. As you know, I am planning a trip to Disney World, and there are spreadsheets, and revisions, and more revisions, and back-up plans, and contingency plans, and backup plans to the contingency plans, BUT since that trip was already in the works, I thought it only appropriate (in light of the break-up guide and all...just following along...) that I would plan another, NEW, trip. I would LOVE to jet off to Hawaii. HawaiiMom, I even priced tickets and looked into borrowing a timeshare, but there is just no way (I do think it could be a reality 2013 though!) unfortunately right NOW, not only do I not have any leave available, I have zero money in the bank, and robbing one is frowned on.
Soooooo, *little drum roll* Charleston, here I come! OK, here Booya and I come...in two months, if neither of us is dating anyone, and we can get a cheap but nice hotel, and he remembers to book it, and it's only for two days, but whatever...
I'm really all about the planning anyway. If the trip happens, great, we had a ton of fun last time and even though the Pea won't be along for the ride, and I have no desire to talk to Booya about Pooh Bear and Crocodiles (or was it alligators?) it could still be fun. More fun for me at this moment though, is the way planning takes me out of the present, and transports me into a time and place where I don't have to worry about anything; someone else cleans up after me, someone else cooks for me, and I don't have to set an alarm. That is a pretty damn happy place and just thinking about it makes me feel better.
I may start planning another Disney trip just for good measure...and one to Massachusetts...oooh, Hilton Head could be fun.
Roger, that.
I have no problem planning a trip. I plan trips all the damn time. I spend more time planning vacations than I actually spend ON vacation. As you know, I am planning a trip to Disney World, and there are spreadsheets, and revisions, and more revisions, and back-up plans, and contingency plans, and backup plans to the contingency plans, BUT since that trip was already in the works, I thought it only appropriate (in light of the break-up guide and all...just following along...) that I would plan another, NEW, trip. I would LOVE to jet off to Hawaii. HawaiiMom, I even priced tickets and looked into borrowing a timeshare, but there is just no way (I do think it could be a reality 2013 though!) unfortunately right NOW, not only do I not have any leave available, I have zero money in the bank, and robbing one is frowned on.
Soooooo, *little drum roll* Charleston, here I come! OK, here Booya and I come...in two months, if neither of us is dating anyone, and we can get a cheap but nice hotel, and he remembers to book it, and it's only for two days, but whatever...
I'm really all about the planning anyway. If the trip happens, great, we had a ton of fun last time and even though the Pea won't be along for the ride, and I have no desire to talk to Booya about Pooh Bear and Crocodiles (or was it alligators?) it could still be fun. More fun for me at this moment though, is the way planning takes me out of the present, and transports me into a time and place where I don't have to worry about anything; someone else cleans up after me, someone else cooks for me, and I don't have to set an alarm. That is a pretty damn happy place and just thinking about it makes me feel better.
I may start planning another Disney trip just for good measure...and one to Massachusetts...oooh, Hilton Head could be fun.
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